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Tucson, Gabrielle Giffords, Grief & Healing

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  • Tucson, Gabrielle Giffords, Grief & Healing

    The memorial service last night honoring the victims in the Tucson shooting was compassionate, powerful and incredibly moving. Tears were falling across the nation for the lives lost, the families forever changed and the heroes who, without thought for themselves, sought to protect and help others.

    The man who covered his wife and saved her life at the expense of his own was a hero. The intern who immediately ran through the fallen to render aid, even as they were struggling with the gunman, is a hero. The judge who had dedicated his entire life to serving the people was a hero in my eyes. The first responders and medical team who providing life saving care are heroes in my eyes.

    And I suspect that Congresswoman Gabby Giffords will have many many moments of private courage and heroism as she recovers from this terrible shooting... just as each and every IC patient has shown moments of great courage as they too, strive, to recover and heal.

    President Obama gave one of his finest speeches with points so powerful that they are worth repeating and, perhaps, some self-analysis and discovery!

    "At a time when our discourse has become so sharply polarized, at a time when we are far too eager to lay the blame for all that ails the world at the feet of those who happen to think differently than we do, it's important for us to pause for a moment and make sure that we are talking with each other in a way that, that heals, not in a way that wounds."

    This couldn't be more true. The American psyche has taken a terrible beating at the hands of political pundits and extremist politics who glory in creating dissension. Throw in religious fundamentalists who believe that only they should determine how we live our lives and it's no wonder people feel defensive. Life is filled with conflict and we are each challenged to defend our viewpoints but do we have to do it at the expense of others? Does a victory always have to involve the humiliation and degradation of our foe? Do I have a right to tell someone else how they SHOULD live?

    "As we discuss these issues, let each of us do so with a good dose of humility. Rather than pointing fingers or assigning blame, let's use this occasion to expand our moral imaginations, to listen to each other more carefully, to sharpen our instincts for empathy, and remind ourselves of all the ways our hopes and dreams are bound together."

    Whatever happened to empathy? Why has it been devalued in our daily lives rather than encouraged? In the past twenty years, and ironically during the age of the internet, we seem to have lost touch with others. Our relationships have grown more superficial rather than meaningful. Some people prefer a ten word tweet rather than a ten minute talk on the phone. I don't like this trend. I'd rather have lunch with a friend where I can see their face, give them a hug and feel connected and less alone. I think a lot of us have moments of profound loneliness. I certainly do.

    "And if, as has been discussed in recent days, their death helps usher in more civility in our public discourse, let us remember it is not because a simple lack of civility caused this tragedy, it did not, but rather because only a more civil and honest public discourse can help us face up to the challenges of our nation, in a way that would make them proud."

    This morning, critics were yet again at work, this time suggesting that the memorial service SHOULD have been done a different way. In grief, there are no SHOULDS. We each struggle with our feelings and, as a nation, we are clearly struggling with finding our hearts again. We must remember that lives are at stake.

    Earlier this week, the Golden Gate Bridge authority shared the news that they intend to replace all human toll takers who machines... and I say, where is the heart in that. Forty people who won't have a job or health insurance. Forty people who may struggle to find another job. Why can't you give them a pay cut but atleast let them work?

    So too the corporate profit mongers who happily close factories in the USA or ship the production of items to other countries and then demand a federal tax break? Come on! Do they not understand that they are decimating families? Where is the heart in our business practices? Shouldn't we be asking ourselves how our businesses and corporations can support the community.

    Government has the same obligation. Here in California, our new Governor Jerry Brown, has shared a new budget that does indeed cut services dramatically to help our state recover. There's no doubt that we, as a state, got used to living the high life during the dot.com boom when massive income supported a larger government.. but we don't have those funds anymore and we can't offer the wide variety of services we used to. Yet, he has shown some compassion too. Rather than massive personnel cuts, he proposed a cross the board 10% pay cut so that ATLEAST people could keep their jobs and benefits.

    The point that I'm trying to make is that there are people, families, children that are impacted by how we talk to each other and the actions that we take. As Obama so passionately said, we must remind ourselves of all the ways our hopes and dreams are bound together. We must remember that while we might disagree with someone, it doesn't mean that they are evil. We must remember that our words have the power to hurt but also the chance to inspire. Our decisions can nurture others rather than harm them. And, yes, we must also forgive those who may have tread so heavily upon our toes in daily lives. For me to be healthier and happier in my daily life, I have to focus on the good moments rather bad.

    Just a few thoughts dancing around my brain this cool, rainy, Winter morn.

    Jill O
    Would you like to talk with someone about your IC struggles? The ICN now offers personal coaching sessions that include myself, Julie Beyer RD on the diet and Dr. Heather Howard on Sexuality. http://www.icnsales.com/icn-personal-coaching/

    Looking for books, magazines & reports on IC? Please visit the ICN Shop at: http://www.icnsales.com: Your ICN subscription & purchases in our shop support these message boards, chats and special events. BECOME AN ICN ANGEL TODAY!

    Please remember that the information on the ICN is provided with the understanding that ICN, its founder, staff, volunteers, and participants are not engaged in rendering medical or professional medical services. We cannot and do not give medical advice. Only your personal physician can do this for you.







  • #2
    I had tears in my eyes listening to our president. He is so very right. Politics, aided by the news media, has become more and more negative and just keeps getting worse and worse. We need to all accept that our beliefs and opinions are not necessarily those possessed by others --- and that we may never agree --- and that doesn't make them wrong, or me right!

    I am very pleased this afternoon to hear that Congresswoman Giffords is showing some improvement.

    Thank you, Jill, for posting about this.

    Donna
    Stay safe


    Elmiron Eye Disease Information Center - https://www.ic-network.com/elmiron-p...mation-center/
    Elmiron Eye Disease Fact Sheet (Downloadable) - https://www.ic-network.com/wp-conten...nFactSheet.pdf

    Have you checked the ICN Shop?
    Click on ICN Shop at the top of this page. You'll find Bladder Builder and Bladder Rest, both of which we are finding have excellent results.

    Patient Help: http://www.ic-network.com/patientlinks.html

    Sub-types https://www.ic-network.com/five-pote...markably-well/

    Diet list: https://www.ic-network.com/interstitial-cystitis-diet/

    AUA Guidelines: https://www.ic-network.com/aua-guide...tial-cystitis/

    I am not a medical authority nor do I offer medical advice. In all cases, I strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.
    [3MG]

    Anyone who says something is foolproof hasn't met a determined fool

    Comment


    • #3
      Did anyone watch diane Sawyers interview with her Husband last n ight? I missed about 15 minutes of it because I didn't know that it was on, but I had teas in my eyes, it was almost too much for me.

      Comment


      • #4
        I thought that her husband was so STRONG!!! Exactly what she needs right now. He totally impressed me!
        Would you like to talk with someone about your IC struggles? The ICN now offers personal coaching sessions that include myself, Julie Beyer RD on the diet and Dr. Heather Howard on Sexuality. http://www.icnsales.com/icn-personal-coaching/

        Looking for books, magazines & reports on IC? Please visit the ICN Shop at: http://www.icnsales.com: Your ICN subscription & purchases in our shop support these message boards, chats and special events. BECOME AN ICN ANGEL TODAY!

        Please remember that the information on the ICN is provided with the understanding that ICN, its founder, staff, volunteers, and participants are not engaged in rendering medical or professional medical services. We cannot and do not give medical advice. Only your personal physician can do this for you.






        Comment


        • #5
          I think he's a good candidate for sainthood! She is so very fortunate to have his support.

          Donna
          Stay safe


          Elmiron Eye Disease Information Center - https://www.ic-network.com/elmiron-p...mation-center/
          Elmiron Eye Disease Fact Sheet (Downloadable) - https://www.ic-network.com/wp-conten...nFactSheet.pdf

          Have you checked the ICN Shop?
          Click on ICN Shop at the top of this page. You'll find Bladder Builder and Bladder Rest, both of which we are finding have excellent results.

          Patient Help: http://www.ic-network.com/patientlinks.html

          Sub-types https://www.ic-network.com/five-pote...markably-well/

          Diet list: https://www.ic-network.com/interstitial-cystitis-diet/

          AUA Guidelines: https://www.ic-network.com/aua-guide...tial-cystitis/

          I am not a medical authority nor do I offer medical advice. In all cases, I strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.
          [3MG]

          Anyone who says something is foolproof hasn't met a determined fool

          Comment

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