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Recently I heard about a member getting a nasty PM (private message) from someone else - this happens from time to time. I ran across this piece and thought it gave some great tips for handling ourselves on a message board whether through posting or through PMs.
It's easy to feel passionate about a particular topic and to want to express ourselves and our position. We all need the reminder from time to time that we are dealing with REAL people on message boards and that even words typed up on a computer can and do hurt others. Often when someone has posted something it is because they are feeling quite vulnerable. Angry or pointed words towards them may hurt more than they would at another time.
I know I need the reminders below from time to time and often have to exercise restraint when posting. Just because we have an opinion on something or feel someone else isn't doing what we would do in a given situation doesn't give us the right to go off on them or put them down. Sometimes it is better just to not post or PM when we feel that way.
Anyway, I thought this was a nice summary of "Netiquette" suggestions:
It's easy to feel passionate about a particular topic and to want to express ourselves and our position. We all need the reminder from time to time that we are dealing with REAL people on message boards and that even words typed up on a computer can and do hurt others. Often when someone has posted something it is because they are feeling quite vulnerable. Angry or pointed words towards them may hurt more than they would at another time.
I know I need the reminders below from time to time and often have to exercise restraint when posting. Just because we have an opinion on something or feel someone else isn't doing what we would do in a given situation doesn't give us the right to go off on them or put them down. Sometimes it is better just to not post or PM when we feel that way.
Anyway, I thought this was a nice summary of "Netiquette" suggestions:
Hints for keeping your cool – and building your reputation as a valued community representative
1. Don't be afraid to let someone off the hook. Just because you've proven someone else wrong doesn't mean you need to press the issue until you've received a full written apology. Let it go.
2. Don't be afraid to back off your position, or change your mind outright. No one can know everything. Sometimes someone will come along and be better versed on a subject then you are. Don't let your ego stop you from learning something new.
3. Avoid personal insults. They do nothing for a discussion.
4. It is ok for someone to disagree with you. No, really.
5. No opinion, no matter how substantiated by facts is beyond reproach. Don't think yours is special.
6. People have bad days. Don't fly off the handle because someone is being rude or grouchy. Seeing a rude post isn't a green light to reply rudely.
7. You only see text, but it's a real person that wrote it. Don't abuse the anonymity of the Internet to post replies you would never do in a face to face conversation.
8. If you have something to say on a matter, say it honestly. Don't attempt to spin it to put it in a more positive light. It is easier to defend honesty then to defend a position that wasn't really yours to begin with.
9. Don't be afraid to post. If the responses are crude or reek of elitism, that is their fault. Apologize for attempting to learn something and move on.
10. Don't be afraid to not post. There is no law requiring you to post. If you are getting upset over an issue, don't reply until you've given enough time for your emotions to calm and you can post clearly.
http://www.iidb.org/vbb/showthread.php?t=156674
1. Don't be afraid to let someone off the hook. Just because you've proven someone else wrong doesn't mean you need to press the issue until you've received a full written apology. Let it go.
2. Don't be afraid to back off your position, or change your mind outright. No one can know everything. Sometimes someone will come along and be better versed on a subject then you are. Don't let your ego stop you from learning something new.
3. Avoid personal insults. They do nothing for a discussion.
4. It is ok for someone to disagree with you. No, really.
5. No opinion, no matter how substantiated by facts is beyond reproach. Don't think yours is special.
6. People have bad days. Don't fly off the handle because someone is being rude or grouchy. Seeing a rude post isn't a green light to reply rudely.
7. You only see text, but it's a real person that wrote it. Don't abuse the anonymity of the Internet to post replies you would never do in a face to face conversation.
8. If you have something to say on a matter, say it honestly. Don't attempt to spin it to put it in a more positive light. It is easier to defend honesty then to defend a position that wasn't really yours to begin with.
9. Don't be afraid to post. If the responses are crude or reek of elitism, that is their fault. Apologize for attempting to learn something and move on.
10. Don't be afraid to not post. There is no law requiring you to post. If you are getting upset over an issue, don't reply until you've given enough time for your emotions to calm and you can post clearly.
http://www.iidb.org/vbb/showthread.php?t=156674
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