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  • #16
    (((((((((((mary)))))))))))))) yup you topped them all.. now I am grateful, my kids aren't family lol..
    'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

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    • #17
      Oh my lord Mary!! That has got to be the worst thing I have ever heard of ANY family member doing to someone else!! I think I would have ripped her throat out for trying to get my babies taken away from me.
      Even if my MIL is nasty sometimes and doesn't usually compliment people she knows that I'm a good mom and that I work really hard and need a break sometimes. She's the one that told me on Saturday morning that sometimes you just have to listen to your body and get the rest you need (I couldn't drag my butt out of bed until almost 10 am, I was just soooo tired).
      Christine



      I have been diagnoised for 6 1/2 years now. I have taken a long break from the ICN but really miss helping out my fellow IC patients and want to get back into posting.
      1st hydro 4/07 showed no visible signs of IC but tons of mast cells in all my biopsy samples which did prove IC.
      2nd hydro 4/13/09 showed dark purple glomerulations and I had a capacity of 450 cc's. This hydro proved that my IC had progressed.
      I have tried every oral medication as well as rescue instills and DMSO.

      I have been lucky enough to see Dr Hanno, the top IC specialist in PA who has told me due to the fact that I have not responded to any "standard" treatments that I have a severe, end stage case of IC with a horrible quality of life (didn't have to tell me that last part!)

      Proud wifey of Shane, mommy to Griffin, and step-mom to Logan and Gage
      Also proud mom to the best Bullmastiff on earth, Claus

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      • #18
        Wow! I feel really good about my MIL now! I was just telling my friends this weekend about how she always feeds me outdated food and then tells me about it to gross me out. A few weeks ago she fed us tacos then afterward told us how she scraped mold off the salsa before she served it (gag). Compared to you all's I got a keeper though! I actually have to tell hubby to not be so hard on her. I have learned though to never eat what she's cooked!

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        • #19
          Meme...

          I have just one thing to say. GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
          Mommy to 2 crazy, wonderful kids and wife to the most amazing man in the world!

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          • #20
            Jess, I've got 2 sons and while it will be a while before either get married, I can assure you there is no way I will be one of those MIL's....I've learned how NOT to be, and know that I'll never be that way, ever, ever, ever.
            *IC-- Summer 2004; PFD--October 2005
            *Fibro--Fall 2000; CFS-- Fall 2000
            *MPS--Fall 2000; Crohn's disease-- 1997*IBS,GERD, *Migraines, hypothyroidism, GYN problems *Degenerative Disc Disease/scoliosis

            Total Abdominal Hysterectomy--adenomyosis--9\08

            04/17/09 Crohn's disease almost killed me with a combo of extreme constipation from pain medications. My bowel ruptured, I almost died from peritonitis and spent several days in the ICU then more in a private room on the floor. If you have any questions about severe constipation from pain meds please don't hesitate to send me a message.

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            • #21
              This X-Mas was awful and uncomfortable because my MIL baked up a big old breakfast, but would not sit down to the table. We were all sitting with the food around the table and my MIL was on the phone with her mom making exasperated sighs and so on. She makes a big fuss over nothing - all the time. So, her husband goes, "Okay, well lets just eat."
              His son was like, "really?"
              FIL goes, "Well, pick at it."
              She kept a room full of guests sitting around the table waiting for her for, for like 45 minutes or more. My brother-in-law's girlfriend said later she could tell no one wanted to be there.
              The phone conversation was about how the grandma couldn't make it and wanted MIL to pick up her gifts. So much drama over nothing.
              I have many more! I want to read all yours, but haven't gotten a chance yet.

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              • #22
                Okay,
                Well I thought it was weird that my MIL was being so nice to me over the weekend. It's kinda of one of those things like you are waiting for the other shoe to drop. She's kinda crazy so you never know what will set her off.
                Well yesterday morning I got up and found her air conditioner still on in her room (we don't have central air so we have to have window units.) She leaves for work at like 6:30am and doesn't get up till like 4pm. So I went into her room and shut it off and told hubby about it. He said that he would talk to her about it. Well I guess he did and she did turn it off this morning but she called him on her lunch break being a big pain in the a** about the whole thing and how the kids had to go change the position of her fan in her room to try to keep it cool. Hello, she's gone all that time but she wants to leave the AC on, she's going to cost me a furtune. My electric bill literally doubled from the last bill to this one and it hasn't even gotten really hot yet. She thinks that she should be able to keep it on so her cats aren't hot. They like the heat! The go out in the hot hallway anyway!! Not to mention the fact that they are cats, they can handle the heat, she has her window open and a fan going, they'll be okay. I said if she wants to add about $75 a month to her rent then she can leave it on all day, of course she doesn't like that answer.
                That's the small thing, when I got home MIL was heading up to her room, hubby taking a nap on the couch and Logan, oldest step son is downstairs, so is Griffin and step-daughter Miranda. Miranda is on the phone. Apperantly she said something was "gay", we don't like them using this word so Logan told her not to, she then mumbled something underneath her breathe. Whenever she does this it's because she's saying something nasty she's not supposed to say so people won't hear it. Logan called her on it. I asked her what she said, she called him a name, I yelled at her for it as well as some other crap that she has done this week. I guess she goes upstairs and cries to her grandmother about it. MIL comes downstairs and comes in the kitchen all loud and says "We need to clear this up right now!!" Clear what up? She thinks I yelled at her for something else. She says she was downstairs when it happened, no you weren't this was a different incident from what she was talking about. I could not believe how she got all loud with me, from what Miranda had told you, mind you that Miranda is practically a pathological liar!! We ended up having a screaming match while I was trying to cook dinner! Ugh!!
                Sorry so long, feel better after complaing about it though!
                Christine



                I have been diagnoised for 6 1/2 years now. I have taken a long break from the ICN but really miss helping out my fellow IC patients and want to get back into posting.
                1st hydro 4/07 showed no visible signs of IC but tons of mast cells in all my biopsy samples which did prove IC.
                2nd hydro 4/13/09 showed dark purple glomerulations and I had a capacity of 450 cc's. This hydro proved that my IC had progressed.
                I have tried every oral medication as well as rescue instills and DMSO.

                I have been lucky enough to see Dr Hanno, the top IC specialist in PA who has told me due to the fact that I have not responded to any "standard" treatments that I have a severe, end stage case of IC with a horrible quality of life (didn't have to tell me that last part!)

                Proud wifey of Shane, mommy to Griffin, and step-mom to Logan and Gage
                Also proud mom to the best Bullmastiff on earth, Claus

                Comment


                • #23
                  i AM so sorry for you Christine!!! You have your MIL in the house with you! YIkes!! Oh, that has to be hard. I think I'd move out and have my hubby come visit me if his mom moved in!!!
                  Good luck with it! My MIL was actually handcuffed and taken into the pysch ward a few summers ago. She got really worked up about not being invited on our camping trip. She would hate camping - believe me! she called my husband and confronted him about it and he said, "Come along. ... Mom I'll come pick you up! Etc." He was being totally welcoming. She said she went out and bought all kinds of camping gear and stuff for the trip thinking we were all going. I can see how her feelings got hurt because my FIL was invited - they are divorced. It's just that he plans the whole thing basically and how weird would it be for him if she was there?
                  ANyway, I know how difficult MILs can be. I think you should tell her the cats will be fine. If you're paying the bills, it's your call. Don't let her walk all over you!

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                  • #24
                    Husbands should set boundaries with their own mothers!

                    Many family counselors will say it is the responsibility of the husband to confront his own mother over issues like these. It is not the wife's position to set boundaries with the MIL. If it were my mother being a witch, then it would be my responsibility to set boundaries and work out reasonable behavior. When the husband doesn't step up to the plate when his own mother is mistreating his wife and wrecking any normal family boundaries, then he is part of the problem. Him not taking action is equal to him just sitting back and letting someone abuse you. Speaking from a great deal of experience...

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                    • #25
                      Ads, I would agree with you much of the time especially when I have been extremely hurt by my MIL, but due to past issues, it always comes back to me being sensitive or mishearing or something. I posted a long MIL story a few minutes ago. My husband and I are going to go speak to our pastor to see how to handle the latest isssue. My hubby is going to try to say something again, but like many of you, my MIL is more than just evil and never admits any unkindness, etc. What is so funny is that her mother was horrible. She had just 2 daughters. My mother-in-law has 3 sons with 2 of them married (happily). The other son spends alot of time with "free room and board" due to his drug and shoplifting habits, so I don't foresee her having much in the way of help when she gets older. My sister-in-law and I already make jokes about how our husbands that can't even make their minds up about what to get their mom for mother's day since they depend on their wives are going to do when their mother is elderly and needs care. I have already warned my husband that she will be put in a home or have nursing care. Both the in-laws have long-term care insurance. (Thank God that my FIL was an insurance agent! I certainly won't be there to change her diaper! I can just hear myself say "you aren't really sick", or I didn't realize that you couldn't eat sugar...I forgot that you were a diabetic! etc!!! Just like she has done to me for years. She loves to fix Italian food when she invites us for dinner, so I have learned to bring my own food when we are invited since she always forgot that I was so "picky"!.

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                      • #26
                        Tracey,
                        I have found another part of family patterns are to blame the daughter-in-law for being the problem, when it is actually the MIL. Many times MILs will be abusive when no one else is around, so it is easy to blame you. I just wanted to make sure you haven't been so poorly treated that you are blaming yourself unfairly. Maybe you could step back and ask someone outside the family what they think. Please don't blame yourself if it isn't your fault.

                        I am sorry you are going thru this!

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                        Originally posted by Tracey83 View Post
                        Ads, I would agree with you much of the time especially when I have been extremely hurt by my MIL, but due to past issues, it always comes back to me being sensitive or mishearing or something...

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