My Battle With Myself,My Family,and I.C.

[judeju]

I have suffered all of my life with urinary problems. In 1989 I became very sick and after numerous test and numerous doctors could not get a diagnoses. I began to pass chunks of meaty looking tissue. I was scheduled for a cystoscopy. My ureters were so small a scope would not go into my kidneys. I ended up in the hospital for several days, first with severe kidney spasms and then a staff infection. I left the hospital still with no diagnoses. Two years went by fairly smoothe when it hit again. This time I was down!! Thru many more doctors and many more test I can remember thinking every minute of my pain filled days "they're going to let me die and I'll never know what was wrong!" Finally blood showed up in my urine. I personally choose a urologist at St. Vincent Hospital in Indianapolis that I had come to know after several years of him treating my oldest daughter for two years for bladder reflux, from age 3 to 5. Finally a doctor who listened and said "I bet I know the problem!" I was scheduled for another cystoscopy with a biopsy. In 1992 I recieved my diagnoses of I.C. So now I knew it wasn't in my head ,and now I knew it by name! My husband packed his bags and went on the road to work so he could make more money for my long list of medical bills. Yea, right! He couldn't deal with it.He would come home every weekend with one thing on his mind, even if the total weakness of my body glowed. I eventually found out he was at the bars every night after work. I began to get phone calls from women looking for him! In 1995 after our bill condition got so out of hand with me trying to take care of them all and deal with I.C.,I convinced him to change jobs so he could be home. My primary care givers at that time were my 3 children from my first marriage and they were now entering preteen years and I had my hands full!! Little did I know what was ahead. Since he came home I have endured nothing but insults and put downs over my condition and the medication I had to take to have any kind of life. Every day this man who suppose to love me and stand by, broke my heart. Finally just in Sept. I decided this is insane. I can never be treated right by this man no matter how much I love him (and that's alot),I'm miserable, he's miserable,it's time to go. I have filed for legal seperation and in a sense feel the weight of the world has been lifted off of me. I had Interstim Test Stimulation done 02-05-01, and it is working. I am looking forward to my new life with my kids,grandkid, and theone on the way. I have had to put this in God's hands knowing whatever the outcome he is in control taking care of me!I love him so much and thank him everyday for the strength and the courage he gives to me. Now my kids are coming to visit and with the help of Interstim Therapy I am starting school in May to learn Insurance coding...GOD IS THE GREAT PHYSICAN... of body, mind, and soul. Judeju

[lilac22362]

Hi judeju,
I'm so sorry for what you are going through. But the one thing you do know is to just keep trusting God, he is the only answer. I noticed you said Indianapolis, you are talking Indiana right? I live in Indiana and I'm searching for other IC'ers who do as well. I wish I could do more to help in your situation all I can offer is prayer which I've personally found to be the greatest gift we can do for others. I wish we were close and support each other through this terrible disease. God Bless you and feel free to write me at [email protected] I feel so badly that your husband could not deal with all this but remember it is in God's hands. Love and prayers to you...Rene

[Lorie]

You are a strong woman. Keep the faith in God and yourself, and you will be fine. You have a great support system here on ICN .

Love&Hugggs

Lorie

[ICNDonna]

My hat is off to you. You have such amazing strength. You will make it and you will be happy and satisfied with your life.

Love,
Donna

[Teri]

Welcome Judgeju
You sound like one strong lady with your s**t in the right order (oooooopppps, didn't mean the swear word)

I also had a sucesfull interstim surgery in Dec of 99 ~ it's totally changed my life and I don't where I would be today had I not had it done.

Why don't you go over to the interstim success board and post about your success??? And, maybe share a little about how your dr got you ready for your surgery as far as telling you what would be done, the kind of treatment he gave you etc?????

I think you are going to make a WONDERFUL addition to our family.

tons of hugs teri


[This message has been edited by ICNDonna (edited 02-20-2001).]