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Weird lonely feeling?

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  • Weird lonely feeling?


    I am still newly diagnosed so I thought I could ask here. If there's someplace else I should have posted please let me know.

    I had my cystoscopy on Friday and have been on the IC diet (only foods from the really good column) for 2 weeks now. I am still sore down there so I am still on half of a pain pill every 6 hours. Taking lots of baking soda baths too!

    Anyhoo... with that brief history...

    I have noticed that since my diagnosis I have felt extremely lonely. I am 27 but still live at home (by choice) and my mom works days. I am blessed to have a work from home job (I am working 1/2 shifts until my pain goes away some more). When my mom leaves to go to work at 6 I get this sudden rush of sadness/loneliness. It's almost like feeling homesick. Before this I was always 100% fine being alone in the house with just the animals. Now I am starting to dread when she leaves. Has anyone else experienced this?

    I have some Xanax that I got from the ER (before I could get to an Urologist) that I needed because I was having panic attacks from the pain/frequency. I really want to try and stay away from them unless it's an emergency but when it comes time for her to leave I am sure tempted.

    It's kind of confusing. I don't have a rational idea why I have this feeling.


  • #2
    I think it would be a good idea to talk with your doctor about this; it may be that you will need to take some medications to help you through this tough time. You've just been told you have a condition for which there is no known cure --- it will take you a while for you to get used to the idea and accept it. I do know it can be overwhelming.

    Sending gentle hugs,
    Stay safe

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    • #3
      I am *trying* to stay away from physciatric medications. I was on Prozac/Clonazepam etc. from 18-26. I tappered off them myself because they stopped working a few years in. I would be willing to talk to someone and I might do that if it keeps up.



      • #4
        I am so sorry that you are feeling that way.

        I've been sick with many things for quite some time and it can be a very lonely and isolating situation. I think that some level of loneliness is a very natural response to being sick and in pain.

        I live with my boyfriend and sometimes I do feel lonely when he leaves for work. It is very nice to have my dog to hang out with.

        Also trying to establish a routine for immediately after your mom leaves can be very helpful. For me, it is a queue to do my meditation and stretches for the day.
        Current treatment:
        Elmiron 100mg 3x a day
        Hydroxyzine 75mg
        Lyrica 100mg 3x a day
        Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy started 12/10
        Ativan 1-2mg as needed

        Bloging my thoughts at


        • #5
          I know the feeling. There's something about being in pain that brings out a feeling of vulnerability, and it's scary especially when you are used to feeling healthy and energetic and confident. I had a terrible time with anxiety when my symptoms first started but have since been able to deal a lot better with it and have adjusted. I did take Ativan in the beginning which not only helped the anxiety but also helped relieve the bladder and pelvic muscle spasms. You will get through this and if counseling is needed you may find it really helpful. I have been pain free now for quite a few months and I was pretty bad at one time- so it can and probably will get better as you learn what to do and how to help yourself with this condition. I think what you're feeling right now is a pretty common and normal feeling at first.


          • #6
            Thanks earthlady and SFGirl!

            It does make sense that since I am 'newly' sick with something (especially when I have been 100% healthy until now) it would make me more vulnerable.

            Hopefully as I start to feel more and healthier again I will gain that confidence back.

            Since I was on a muscle relaxant-type medicine for so many years my Dr. didn't think it would work so well for me for the IC. It makes me wish I hadn't taken it for so long because I bet it would help now. I have frequency issues not pain as such. It would be nice to calm the spasms. Oh well.

            The routine idea sounds good. I'll have to try that.


            • #7
              You could ask your dr. about some of the antispasmodics that are non narcotic and non benzos that may help your frequency.


              • #8
                you for you!

                Remind yourself that you are always going to take care of yourself, that you are strong. You are your best friend, always there. I know it sounds strange but sometimes we forget to tell ourselves that we love ourselves!
                I got IC in 1970! I was not diagnosed until 1991. I've tried many drugs and therapies but I tend to only resort to drugs when in a flare because when I am not in a flare (from being good on diet), I suffer only from small bladder volume (like about 7 ozs.) and peeing will relieve the discomfort. When I am feeling relatively normal, I say to myself I am glad I am not on a drug. When I am in a flare, I say, why am I not on a drug! I've recently have been trying to solve my connective issue problems in general. I look to diet and herbs mostly unless it gets really bad. I still think there is great hope for each individual finding a path to healing and there are many.


                • #9
                  Everybody gave you good advice already. My husband works 6 nights a week and sleeps days. My son has moved in with his girlfriend and my daughter is either at work or out with friends. I to experienced feeling lonely. I had three dogs and 2 have passed on, one passed last month.I have one dog now and he is a devoted companion. So that helps with the lonely feeling a bit. MY house is also feeling a bit empty without the kids, husband and dogs walking about the house. In the past when the house was to busy I wished for a quiet life and now I have it and not always liking it. Find things to do to keep busy. Not only does it make the time go by but it also keeps your mind off of IC and the pain an discomfort that comes with it. If you have a dog, go for a short walk everyday. I dont know what your hobbies are but I love to cook\bake , work in the garden, read and watch movies. You could kill two birds with one a bit of housework or food shopping, get dinner started for your mom. These things will help your mom and also keep you busy and it will take your mind off your problems. Make plans for your free time and turn it into a routine.