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Help Ineed Advice/ Adoption

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  • Help Ineed Advice/ Adoption

    I know this is the considering pregnancy post, but I didnt know where else to post this. I am possibly looking into adoption. I am going to be 38 and with my IC I just feel I really dont want to give birth. Although this saddens me [img]frown.gif[/img] I am going to be 38 tomorrow andd that is another factor,my age. I know some with IC go into remission, but at my age I just feel like I couldnt handle the whole birth thing. I have contacted 2 agancies, I knew it was going to be very expensive, but whoa <img src="graemlins/eek.gif" border="0" alt="[eek]" /> I have gone on sites for the foster care thing, my only problem with that is most of those poor children are disabled, and with my IC I dont know if I could handle a child with special needs. I have to be honest. I would love to see every child disabled or well happy and in a loving home.But I have to be realistic about what I can handle. This whole adoption thing is overwhelming, has anyone privately adopt give me some advice where to start what to do. You can email me at [email protected] Thank you-JOJO

  • #2
    JoJo---One of the best things you could do is put it out there. Tell everyone you know and meet, you want a child. Sometimes people get lucky, through word of mouth, and find a young teenager or someone who is just not ready for a family. A lady from my church did this and well I guess you could say she got lucky.

    Another thing she told me was fostering with the intent to adopt. Just remember though anything could happen this way. It's probably too risky. (A good way to get your heart broken).

    Good luck and I hope it works out for you. I'm 26 and I thought I wanted to wait. But my husband was 36. He thought his "time" was running out. So now our son is 6 months. I can't have anymore so I too may look into adoption in the future. Let me know how it's going! [img]wink.gif[/img]

    Tons of support,

    IC angel helping families in need for the holidays. [email protected]


    • #3
      Depending on where you live, there could be a lot less expensive options for you. If you are willing to look at bi-racial adoption, this can sometimes be much quicker. Also, the state has "older children" that are available for placement and may not require the same fees. You may also find that an older child is more manageable than in infant if you have severe IC.

      We adopted our son from Guatemala 2 1/2 years ago at the age of 8 months. He's a joy, but a handful and I could not manage without the support of my husband and friends. While this was a more expensive route to take, we were not eligible at many agencies because of our ages. I was 42 and my husband 45 at the time.

      To me, my son is my son and biology has absolutely nothing to do with it. I was unable to have children due to endometriosis, DES an IC and I don't feel I missed out on anything by not giving birth to him. It is the most wonderful thing you can do for someone else and yourself. When my IC is really bad, he pats my tummy, kisses me and tells me he hopes I get better - what a wonderful treatment. Take care, Lesley