This is more of a vent than anything else, but I would really be interested to hear from women out there that might be going through the same thing.
I turned 27 this past weekend. One of the effects of getting older is that my biological clock has gotten louder and my babylust level is going up.
My husband knows this. We've had discussions about it repeatedly. We agreed to wait another year or two and revisit the subject when the credit cards were paid off.
Unfortunately my recent IC flare up has changed things. Normally my flares lasted two to three weeks. This flare started in April and shows no signs of stopping for any significant length of time.
Having a chronic illness changes things when it comes to having children. I'm afraid about a lot. I'm afraid of the general health and wellbeing of my body. I'm afraid that I'll get pregnant and be one of the minority that lives in constant horrific pain. I'm afraid that my health will deteriorate to the point where pregnancy just isn't possible, or that after years of pain I just plain won't be able to stand pregnancy symptoms on top of everything else.
I tried explaining these changes I'm going through to my husband, and while he's a wonderful man, he's also 27 and young. I got two sentances into my explination and he lectured me for a half an hour about why he isn't ready.
Some of the things he said made me angry. Really really angry. He said some stupid stupid things, like that we shouldn't be worrying about a biological clock until at LEAST 30.
Um, Hello? Is this thing on? What is this "we" kemosabe? Did I not explain that it's MY body doing this, jerkface? Thanks for letting me know what my body should reasonably be telling me.
I'm not trying to force him into kids. I'm trying to let him know that I have concerns about the time frame that we discussed. I want to talk about realistic expectations and the fact that babies (particularly of an IC mom) take PLANNING. And I think it's time to start planning. Not trying, but talking about trying.
He has a history of coming around to scary ideas in his own good time. He talks enough about babies on his own. He despirately wants kids, I know that and he's always said. He's also just obviously despirately afraid.
I understand his fear. I would never "forget" a pill or anything like that. I want to give him the time he needs. But I have stuff going on with me too, and I wish he had the balls to at least listen to what I have to say without knee-jerking into lecture mode.
I'm annoyed and upset. He keeps bringing up kids and needling me about it. It was cute when he was acting like he was sympathetic, now it just ****** me off. I don't want to be teased about it. It's not a joke to me.
We don't have to get pregnant now. I wish he hadn't made it such a miserable thing to even bring up.
Anyone else having the same kind of worries/ problems?
I turned 27 this past weekend. One of the effects of getting older is that my biological clock has gotten louder and my babylust level is going up.
My husband knows this. We've had discussions about it repeatedly. We agreed to wait another year or two and revisit the subject when the credit cards were paid off.
Unfortunately my recent IC flare up has changed things. Normally my flares lasted two to three weeks. This flare started in April and shows no signs of stopping for any significant length of time.
Having a chronic illness changes things when it comes to having children. I'm afraid about a lot. I'm afraid of the general health and wellbeing of my body. I'm afraid that I'll get pregnant and be one of the minority that lives in constant horrific pain. I'm afraid that my health will deteriorate to the point where pregnancy just isn't possible, or that after years of pain I just plain won't be able to stand pregnancy symptoms on top of everything else.
I tried explaining these changes I'm going through to my husband, and while he's a wonderful man, he's also 27 and young. I got two sentances into my explination and he lectured me for a half an hour about why he isn't ready.
Some of the things he said made me angry. Really really angry. He said some stupid stupid things, like that we shouldn't be worrying about a biological clock until at LEAST 30.
Um, Hello? Is this thing on? What is this "we" kemosabe? Did I not explain that it's MY body doing this, jerkface? Thanks for letting me know what my body should reasonably be telling me.
I'm not trying to force him into kids. I'm trying to let him know that I have concerns about the time frame that we discussed. I want to talk about realistic expectations and the fact that babies (particularly of an IC mom) take PLANNING. And I think it's time to start planning. Not trying, but talking about trying.
He has a history of coming around to scary ideas in his own good time. He talks enough about babies on his own. He despirately wants kids, I know that and he's always said. He's also just obviously despirately afraid.
I understand his fear. I would never "forget" a pill or anything like that. I want to give him the time he needs. But I have stuff going on with me too, and I wish he had the balls to at least listen to what I have to say without knee-jerking into lecture mode.
I'm annoyed and upset. He keeps bringing up kids and needling me about it. It was cute when he was acting like he was sympathetic, now it just ****** me off. I don't want to be teased about it. It's not a joke to me.
We don't have to get pregnant now. I wish he hadn't made it such a miserable thing to even bring up.
Anyone else having the same kind of worries/ problems?
Comment