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  • I'm sad

    This looked like a good place to put this.
    I'm sad. I'll be having a hysterectomy in a couple weeks. No more children "ever". This is silly. I'm 38--2 children-a boy and a girl--my youngest is 11. I have other health issues--that's why I stopped after my daughter--I wanted 5 babies . "But" all the sudden this is getting to me. I should be grateful for what I do have. Pity party!! My husband doesn't want anymore children--he rushed in to be fixed right after our daughter was born. So there's a big stopper right there. I guess it's just the option is gone. So I'm sad.

  • #2
    Good Morning!
    I think lots of women deal with that "loss" feeling when dealing with hysterectomy. It's always nice to have that option of more children.....and we lose control of that.
    I had a hyst. 5 yrs ago...I had some of those feeling also. Do you have a good support system.....friends you can discuss this with? lean on? I hope you do.....that helps. If not.....we are always here.....feel free to PM me, I have a good shoulder. Take care......Roxie

    Double Spinal Cord Stimulator surgery 8/09
    Unsuccessful MiniArc sling surgery 12/07
    Dx'd Hypothyroid
    Dx'd Chronic Axonal Neuropathy & Myopathy
    June 2007
    Dx'd IC May 2006 (after suffering for 25+ yrs!)
    First Cysto 1979
    First Hydro 1981 (Many treatments since then!)
    Collagin"Durasphere" injections for urethra
    Gall bladder surgery Aug. 2004
    Gastric Bypass Dec. 2004
    Dx'd: Barrett's Esphogus July 2004
    Dx'd: Vaginal Atrophy 2005
    Bladder surgery 2000
    Dx'd: IBS 2000
    Hysterectomy (fibroids) 1999
    Laminectomy 1989
    Dx'd: Degerative Disk Disorder 1989

    For IC I use Elmiron, Elavil and Freeze dried Aloe Vera (it works likes Elmiron, but naturally)and Azo as needed. I also take Zegerid, Randitine for Barrett's Esophagus. (which causes me to have constant yeast infections!)I take Cymbalta for Neuopathy/Myopathy pain. I use the Climara patch for menopause symptoms. I'm on a very strict diet because of the IC, IBS and Gastric Bypass. I take Primal Defense Probiotics and whole food Iron.
    I no longer have the awful urethral pain! I've been using MSM gel now for 4 mo. and haven't had a flare up or the urethra's amazing stuff!!:woohoo:


    • #3
      I had a complete hysto almost two years ago, I was 42, had two children and many female problems that had plaqued me my whole life. I was happy finally not to have to deal with multiple lapro for endo, painful periods, etc., but at the same time I also felt a loss. It is normal, after you recover and hopefully you will feel better, female wise, it will fade. Good Luck, I had mine by laproscopy, great, no scar and recovery only about 10 days.


      • #4
        I was 39 when I had mine, and have no regrets. I was blessed with one beautiful daughter, that I spent nearly 7 1/2 months in and out of the hospital to carry, and 2 miscarriages at 20 weeks.. I now have a a beautiful foster son 19 months old, that I will be adopting.
        Don't be sad, be happy that you are having a problem corrected that may give you more quality of life.
        'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'


        • #5
          There's a communication board, much like this one, at where you can get some very good support.

          Stay safe

          Elmiron Eye Disease Information Center -
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          Have you checked the ICN Shop?
          Click on ICN Shop at the top of this page. You'll find Bladder Builder and Bladder Rest, both of which we are finding have excellent results.

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          Diet list:

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          I am not a medical authority nor do I offer medical advice. In all cases, I strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

          Anyone who says something is foolproof hasn't met a determined fool


          • #6
            Feelings of loss are so normal. I had one 8 yrs ago when I was 27. I thought I was through with kids, and I had so much pain (IC rele. but did not know at time) I thought this was my last resort. I still have feeling of regret and loss to this day. And they especially hit me when I remarried in 2000. I would have LOVED to have kids with my hubby. But on a bright note I do have the 2 most wonderful kids I could ask for. One of each so I got lucky there.

            The web site Donna gave you is great. I found a ton of support there when i was going through with mine. Good luck to you
            God grant me the serinity to withstand the days ahead!!!

            My myspace link...


            In Memory of My Father (Lawerence) 1/25/2007

            Interstim Sept 2001
            1st InterStim Removal May 2005
            2nd Interstim Implanted May 2005
            2nd InterStim Removed March 2007
            Hysterectomy 1999
            Tubes Tied 1997
            C-Section 1996

            Me and my kids

            Taylor (my daughter) Me and my daughter My son Cody and Taylor


            • #7
              Angie, so sorry that you are sad about it. Just wanting to send hugs.

              Sending hugs, Trishann


              • #8
                It's perfectly normal for you to mourn the loss of your uterus. It's hard to face such finality. I kind of know how you feel. I didn't have to have a hysterectomy, but when my last baby was born, I knew there would be no more. I cried and cried over this. I could have physically had more back then, but financially I knew it was best to stop at 3. Little did I know that I would have such major health problems, so I guess it was a blessing in disguise.

                I really hope the hysterectomy makes you feel better.

                Take care, Sandy
                *IC-- Summer 2004; PFD--October 2005
                *Fibro--Fall 2000; CFS-- Fall 2000
                *MPS--Fall 2000; Crohn's disease-- 1997*IBS,GERD, *Migraines, hypothyroidism, GYN problems *Degenerative Disc Disease/scoliosis

                Total Abdominal Hysterectomy--adenomyosis--9\08

                04/17/09 Crohn's disease almost killed me with a combo of extreme constipation from pain medications. My bowel ruptured, I almost died from peritonitis and spent several days in the ICU then more in a private room on the floor. If you have any questions about severe constipation from pain meds please don't hesitate to send me a message.


                • #9
                  Thanks guys~~I'll get over this. It just kinda hit me how final this is. Now I'm into surgery count down days. What fun!!! :woohoo:


                  • #10
                    I had a hysterectomy at 32(I'm almost 37). I had suffered from infertility and pregnancy losses first, and then had my angel, Lindsey. It was hard initially to see friends getting pregnant(and I was older too)but now I think it was a great thing. Hang in there!

                    (Babs passed away in April 2009. We honor her memory and remember her fondly. - Jill O. ICN President & Founder)

                    [SIZE="1"]Proud mama of a gift named Lindsey who taught me through her autism what is important in life:angel:
                    :angel: IC Angel Volunteer Coordinator :angel:
                    :) Contact me via PM or e-mail if you would like to help
                    I have learned all about life in 3 words: It goes on! :D--Robert Frost
                    PCOS 7/85
                    RSD 7/94 :headbang:
                    Endometriosis 9/98 :toilet:
                    Antiphospholipid antibody syndrome 9/99
                    Kidney stones--too many to count
                    Factor V Leiden mutation 10/02
                    IC 6/03 :evilsmile
                    Deep Venous Thrombosis and Cellulitis 12/05 :loco: DVT and Greenfield Placed 3/14/08
                    "Spirit is an invisible force made visible in all of life"--Maya Angelou
                    "Ohana means family--no one gets left behind or forgotten." Stitch[/SIZE][/SIZE][/SIZE]


                    • #11
                      I had my hysterectomy in nov 04. i have 3 kids. but i still felt the loss. I think it may be harder because the surgery was suppose to fix my problems about 6 months after surgery I found this site. I know now that I could of lived with that fibroid. I was just Diagnosed this year with IC.
                      My younger sister just had a baby and I feel very sad. My last 2 pregnancies were so hard on me that i don't think I could go for #4.
                      You were given a lot of good advice! Hang in there!
                      mom to 3 wonderful kids

                      IC symptoms 7/03,
                      hysterectomy 11/04,
                      prolapse cervix 7/07
                      diagnosed: IC 2007
                      IBS 2008