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My fiance has left me because I am sick! Please give me words of comfort!

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  • Berkshire Road
    replied
    I'm so sorry about all this happening to you, but it sounds like this guy was definitely not ready "for better or for worse, in sickness and in health." As Jen says, time heals all wounds, and as my dad always said, time wounds all heals, too.

    It looks from your picture like you have a faithful companion there, anyway. Dogs are the best anti-depressants ever.

    Things will get better. They will. Just hang in there!

    Leave a comment:


  • KathrynPInk
    replied
    Everyone, your kind supportive words are such a comfort, and I truly, appreciate all of you who have come forward with your own stories, of sorrow and triumph over heartbreak. I wrote because I needed you, and it makes me feel cared for, and it means so, so much.

    I am hoping for a good guy to come along at some point, (when I am not even thinking about it!) and I pray now for strength and guidance to be ok by myself if that is what has to be...but I swear ya'll; I have a lot of love to share with some ** lucky** guy!!! Ha! Well, a girl's gotta hope!

    Love to you all,
    katheryn

    Leave a comment:


  • tigger_gal
    replied
    Hi I just caught your thread. I am so sorry that you are going thru this. A man is not worth tears of sorrow, only tears of happiness and joy. If he cannot provide the love, support, and happiness to you, then HE is NOT worthy enough for your love
    You know I really have no words of wisdom here, because when you are hurting you really just want to vent out your frustrations and want someone to listen to you and give you sympathy. That you need and deserve. so I am throwing in a crying towel, when you are done toss it to someone else so they will have it.. Or back to me, cuz I am sure I'll need it again..
    Hold your head high and proud, you don't need a man, we want them, but they are an accessory They look good on our arm, not on theres..

    Leave a comment:


  • Babs RN
    replied
    Kat,
    Sorry I haven't responded sooner but as you know this topic is very real to me right now too and some days I have a hard time dealing with my own issues and am no help to others. Please, please, please PM me. You have some very empathetic ears for ya.

    Hugs,
    Barb

    Leave a comment:


  • KathrynPInk
    replied
    Dear sweet friends, (and I do think of you all this way!) I so appreciate the support you have given me. I have reread so many of your messages and you have helped me. It is so true that what you say is right. I am still trying to get over this and it sounds like many of you have had to deal with this kind of heartbreak as well. If it wasn't IC, it would have been something else as many of you have pointed out. And your kind gentle reminders that I will be ok has helped with my flare as well. I feel like this is the most supportive thing I have done, joining with all of you to share, support, cry, and rejoice the happy times. Thank you a million times to all you truly beautiful girls...no matter what our ages....we are all here to give support and you all also give great advice!
    If I can ever help any of you out online, I am ready to do just that. I have a lot to learn about stress and my body, but you all have helped me.
    Love, Katheryn

    Leave a comment:


  • jen74
    replied
    You are better off without this guy sweetie. He would only drag you down further. Any person who runs when the chips are down is not worth having around. I know you are hurting right now,but it will get better with time. Sending BIG ))))gentle((((( hugs your way.
    Jen

    Leave a comment:


  • SharonA
    replied
    In 1967, I married the most perfect man. He was everything to me. I put him first in everything. Then one night in 1972, he came home and announced that he no longer loved me and I was to take our son (1 &1/2 years old) and go to my parents house and live there. 3 days later, I was served with divorce papers. In 6 months, I was a single mother and trying to live on my own. I was devastated and so scared.

    Two years later, he came back and asked me to marry him, again. I looked him square in the eyes and told him, "You are two years too late. I am over you and there is no way I would ever think of letting you back into my life".

    In 1980, I met the most perfect man. He was absolutely gorgeous and so very kind. Six weeks after we met, we got married. This past October, we celebrated our 26th Anniversary. He is still gorgeous and still so very kind. He has stuck with me through thick and thin and IC.

    I wondered why I had to go through the heart ache of a divorce and being a single parent. Today I can tell you that, even though it was one of the worst times in my life, I am so glad that the 1st one left. If he hadn't, I would never have had the blessing of meeting my husband.

    I sometimes wonder if the 1st one would have been able to handle everything that IC can change. I sorta doubt it. After all, he couldn't handle it then even though I was healthy.

    Leave a comment:


  • kjd
    replied
    Hon

    you are sooo better off without this man, he doesnt deserve you in the slightest! I know how scared and sad you are right now but this will pass, I promise you! Just feel sorry for this guy, he is obvioulsy pathetic and too imature to be with you!
    Thats his problem not yours so dont you dare blame yourself ok??!!! I have had my heartbroken and it hurt so much I thought I would die so I know how you feel but trust me when I say you will look back at this and realise he wasnt right for you.
    How the hell is he going to cope with everyday life and stress??? He needs to grow up.

    You hold your head up high hon you are an amazing woman and he wasnt good enough for you.
    x

    Leave a comment:


  • LKL
    replied
    Offering hope...

    Katheryn,

    I was left by a fiance too...not because of IC, but because he simply wanted to...and thought I was completely and totally responsible for everything wrong in our relationship.

    Truthfully, as much as it hurt...and humiliating as it was (had church, dresses, decorations....small town) him leaving was the best thing that could have happened. I discovered the man that I was in love with, was the man he was pretending to be... And God protected me, and within a year I re-met the most amazing, kind man.(He is in seminary) We will be married 3 years in May. (We would not have met, if I hadn't experienced the bad stuff)

    The point is, good things can come out of truly horrible things. I pray that for you.

    Leave a comment:


  • maryla
    replied
    Sorry you have to go through the pain

    Hi K,

    Dido, to a lot of advice here. I know you hurt now, but one of these days, when, the 2nd most wonderful guy, (I have the first, lol) in the world comes along , You will thank him. It is a whole lot easier to end a relationship now than to have married him. Thank God for his honestly anyway, however, selfish and self centered he sounds. I do believe it's true, God doesn't close one door without opening another, But it sure can be hell in the hallway. In my past break-ups, I had to linger in the hallway for a while just to grieve, that's ok too.

    Yes, there are wonderful guys out there, but as long as you are with this guy, God can't bring him to you. It sounds like you deserve the best!

    God Bless You, Hugs to you,

    Leave a comment:


  • ngazerro
    replied
    Stay away from sad songs. They are depressing and make you more sad. Try putting on some dance up beat music, and dance around...It helps me..Glad you made it though the night. Each day will get better.

    Leave a comment:


  • traceann
    replied
    Katheryn, I think I have to say, I'll bet most of us at some point of a breakup have done just that! Loaded up on as many sappy, love songs and cried ourselves silly, lol. I know I am guilty of it for sure!

    So - today is a new day! You can start all over again! I highly reccommend only empowering music - like Kelly Clarkson's "Ms. Independant" or the song "Fighter" by Christina Aguilera (both were my theme songs during my divorce, lol), and in your "grieving" time if you want to listen to some sad love songs (if you feel you just have to ), that's the ONLY time you get to listen! Set a timer and call it quits when it rings, hee hee And then it's onward and upward!!!!

    Last edited by traceann; 03-11-2007, 04:01 AM.

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  • KathrynPInk
    replied
    Well girlfriends, I made it through the night. Life will go on as long as it is supposed to...or something like that. I am thankful for you all and your kind words.
    I just listened to Trisha Yearwood on YOUTUBE singing "trying to love you"--someone tell me to stay away form weepy love songs!! I should know better. I heard Paul McCartney singing "calico skies" a song he wrote when Linda, was in Chemo.....now that was love. I hope I find a man to share my life with. Good gosh. I am feeling sorry for myself and that is not good.
    Bless you ALL~~~~
    Katheryn, or just plain K

    Leave a comment:


  • ngazerro
    replied
    I am sorry to hear that he hurt you. I agree with what goes around comes around. Sometimes bad things happen to good people but in the long run they are really good things to get your life back on track..Having him leave opens the door for you to meet someone that is full of love and caring. One day you look back and be glad he left..:woohoo: I realize right now is the hard part, but reach out as much as you want and treat your self special things, and know that you will feel better soon..

    Leave a comment:


  • Zygala87
    replied
    Sorry K but I really believe he would have left for some reason eventually. There are some guys that just can not make a commitment. It might have been lust but not love. A person who loves cares more about their partners and their well-being then they do their own. Devotion, he was never up to it from the get go. This too will pass. Don't think it was just your flare. It could have been a broken leg. We can't control our emotions so cry it out, stay busy as possible and please believe there will come a time that you wouldn't take him back for any price. I care, HUGS, Ziggy

    Leave a comment:

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