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I just can't comes to terms with this

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  • I just can't comes to terms with this

    (Lori I am sorry for posting over your thread)

    My mom is in what her doctor said 3rd Stage Kidney failure, there are only 4 stages from what she understood. She is going to a Kidney specialist tomorrow.. I can't handle this, and I don't know what to do. I really just want to go and get in my bed and just cry. My mom has been sick for a while, and we knew she had kidney problems from the fleets when she had to have a colonoscopy. Her doctor FAILED to check her levels for a 8 months, she knew last July her levels were high. However, now they are alot higher creatons are 2.1 and the bun levels are 33.

    then my sis is on my last nerve, I'll post that in my vent post in the family board..........

    anywho.. could you all please keep my mom in your thoughts, I will totally lose it if something happens to my mom, she is my veery best friend, I tell her everything. I can handle a lot of punches and get back up and fight, but I won't be able to handle it if something really bad happens..
    'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

  • #2
    You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

    IC diagnosed officially via cysto/urodynamics 1/26/07

    Grade II Endometriosis diagnosed via lap 12/11/07

    "Fall down seven times, Stand up eight."

    "Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think."

    Current Treatments:
    Interstim Since 5/25/07!
    Birth Control


    • #3
      I'm sorry Cindy. My mom was just diagnosed with some heart problems, emphysema and fibro. She was a long, LONG term smoker and smoked about 2 packs a day average for years.

      I know how it feels to have a sick parent. I lost my dad 2 years ago this month. It's very, very hard to cope when your parent faces a serious illness.

      I don't have any words of wisdom for you, but you know I'm here if you need anything at all.

      Hugs, Sandy
      *IC-- Summer 2004; PFD--October 2005
      *Fibro--Fall 2000; CFS-- Fall 2000
      *MPS--Fall 2000; Crohn's disease-- 1997*IBS,GERD, *Migraines, hypothyroidism, GYN problems *Degenerative Disc Disease/scoliosis

      Total Abdominal Hysterectomy--adenomyosis--9\08

      04/17/09 Crohn's disease almost killed me with a combo of extreme constipation from pain medications. My bowel ruptured, I almost died from peritonitis and spent several days in the ICU then more in a private room on the floor. If you have any questions about severe constipation from pain meds please don't hesitate to send me a message.


      • #4
        Cindy I am so sorry to hear about your mom health issue. I know the idea of having someone you can talk to about problems and things and then might lose them is very hard.

        My thoughts and prayers are with you, Trishann


        • #5
          Cindy...I am so sorry. Sending you many (((hugs))). It is hard when our parents are ill. Almost as hard as it is when our kids are ill.

          Shopping??? Did someone mention shopping? I'll get my hat... ;-)

          Where I can be found most days.

          Link to the ICN Patient Handbook:

          Link to the IC Diet:

          IC Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.


          • #6
            HI, So sorry to hear about your mother's ill health. It's very difficult when parents are ill. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Roxie

            Double Spinal Cord Stimulator surgery 8/09
            Unsuccessful MiniArc sling surgery 12/07
            Dx'd Hypothyroid
            Dx'd Chronic Axonal Neuropathy & Myopathy
            June 2007
            Dx'd IC May 2006 (after suffering for 25+ yrs!)
            First Cysto 1979
            First Hydro 1981 (Many treatments since then!)
            Collagin"Durasphere" injections for urethra
            Gall bladder surgery Aug. 2004
            Gastric Bypass Dec. 2004
            Dx'd: Barrett's Esphogus July 2004
            Dx'd: Vaginal Atrophy 2005
            Bladder surgery 2000
            Dx'd: IBS 2000
            Hysterectomy (fibroids) 1999
            Laminectomy 1989
            Dx'd: Degerative Disk Disorder 1989

            For IC I use Elmiron, Elavil and Freeze dried Aloe Vera (it works likes Elmiron, but naturally)and Azo as needed. I also take Zegerid, Randitine for Barrett's Esophagus. (which causes me to have constant yeast infections!)I take Cymbalta for Neuopathy/Myopathy pain. I use the Climara patch for menopause symptoms. I'm on a very strict diet because of the IC, IBS and Gastric Bypass. I take Primal Defense Probiotics and whole food Iron.
            I no longer have the awful urethral pain! I've been using MSM gel now for 4 mo. and haven't had a flare up or the urethra's amazing stuff!!:woohoo:


            • #7
              thank you girls.
              'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'


              • #8
                I am soooo soooo very sorry. Having just lost my Dad back in Jan. I totally and completly understand where you are coming from. It is hard to lose a parent. I never realize just how hard it really it is. I know my bladder has been in complete flare since he was put in the hosptial and it has yet to let up.

                I will pray and keep you guys on my prayer list that all works out like it should. I just know it is hard to see them suffer and be sick. My heart goes out to you....((((((((HUGS)))))))
                God grant me the serinity to withstand the days ahead!!!

                My myspace link...


                In Memory of My Father (Lawerence) 1/25/2007

                Interstim Sept 2001
                1st InterStim Removal May 2005
                2nd Interstim Implanted May 2005
                2nd InterStim Removed March 2007
                Hysterectomy 1999
                Tubes Tied 1997
                C-Section 1996

                Me and my kids

                Taylor (my daughter) Me and my daughter My son Cody and Taylor


                • #9


                  • #10

                    Stay safe

                    Elmiron Eye Disease Information Center -
                    Elmiron Eye Disease Fact Sheet (Downloadable) -

                    Have you checked the ICN Shop?
                    Click on ICN Shop at the top of this page. You'll find Bladder Builder and Bladder Rest, both of which we are finding have excellent results.

                    Patient Help:


                    Diet list:

                    AUA Guidelines:

                    I am not a medical authority nor do I offer medical advice. In all cases, I strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

                    Anyone who says something is foolproof hasn't met a determined fool


                    • #11
                      I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I have the exact same relationship with my mom. Even though we live in different states now I talk to her for hours at a time and tell her everything. Next to hubby she is my biggest supporter and I don't know what I would do without her so I can imagine how you are feeling. I hope everything turns out okay and I will keep your family in my thoughts.

                      I have been diagnoised for 6 1/2 years now. I have taken a long break from the ICN but really miss helping out my fellow IC patients and want to get back into posting.
                      1st hydro 4/07 showed no visible signs of IC but tons of mast cells in all my biopsy samples which did prove IC.
                      2nd hydro 4/13/09 showed dark purple glomerulations and I had a capacity of 450 cc's. This hydro proved that my IC had progressed.
                      I have tried every oral medication as well as rescue instills and DMSO.

                      I have been lucky enough to see Dr Hanno, the top IC specialist in PA who has told me due to the fact that I have not responded to any "standard" treatments that I have a severe, end stage case of IC with a horrible quality of life (didn't have to tell me that last part!)

                      Proud wifey of Shane, mommy to Griffin, and step-mom to Logan and Gage
                      Also proud mom to the best Bullmastiff on earth, Claus


                      • #12
                        I am so sorry about your mother!!! I lost my Mother about over 3 years ago and I took care of her 7/24. So I will be prayer for you. Lots of gentle hugs.

                        Deborah Bush
                        I have IC, the IBS, Heartburn, High bloodpressure,thyrod problems, depression and clorties pain.


                        • #13
                          Oh, Cindy, I'm so sorry. (((HUGS))) (Prayers too) The worst thing in the world is to have someone you love with all your heart, suffering and you can't do anything to fix it. It is easier to suffer yourself, than to watch those loved ones suffer.

                          I know kidney disease is pretty scary. The good news is (I mean if anything can be thought of as good news) Stage III isn't really too bad. It's considered moderate kidney disease. Stage IV is severe kidney disease, and somewhere in Stage V is where you need dialysis.

                          I've been kind of reading up about kidney disease and also asking my Nephrologist a lot of questions (I'm always a pain in the neck, LOL) and what I learned is that a person can stay in Stage III for a very long time, sometimes to the end of their life, without ever needing dialysis.

                          The key factor is identifying what caused the moderate kidney damage. If it is something like high blood pressure, or diabetes, and those diseases aren't brought under control, then the kidneys continue to get more and more damaged. But, if the damage is from some chemicals or something that is kind of not an on-going thing, the prognosis is much, much, much better.

                          Here is some info on kidney disease that I found kind of reassuring, I always think I feel reassured when I know more than when I am not given any info:

                          Here is a site that helps you calculate GFR (that's a good measure for how the kidneys are doing):

                          Now this site talks about kidney disease with diabetes (where the damage keeps on happening to the kidneys.) Kidney disease is not detectable until it reaches Stage III anyway, so that is considered the onset of kidney disease. Even with diabetes, which is an ongoing "kill the kidneys" thing, the average time it takes from Stage III to needing dialysis is 23 years. Without diabetes, I am sure it is much, much longer. So I'm guessing that your Mom will pass away from old age before she ever needs dialysis or has any symptoms from kidney disease.


                          I wish I could find some non-diabetes kidney site, my google-skills don't seem very good today.

                          Anyway, it's absolutely natural that you are worried sick about your Mom, and with everything else you are trying to cope with - any other person would have gotten a whole bunch of sniper rifles and ammo and climbed up on a tower to have some target practice, I swear.

                          But I have high hopes for your Mom, I believe she won't have to face dialysis. I know you will know more when she meets with her Nephrologist. Would it maybe even be possible for you to go along with her to the doctor, to ask questions you might have, and to be an advocate for her? I know you are so busy every minute of the day, I just....I thought it might be an idea is all.

                          Blessings and hugs,
                          P.S. I forgot to say, too, that sometimes kidney damage is reversible - last week I was a 3.3 on my creatinine, and as of Monday, I'm at 1.9 on my creatinine. Doctors told me the kidneys have an amazing ability to heal from insults, like from chemicals etc.


                          • #14
                            thank you so very much... it looks like its not all to horrible.. its bad but it could be worse.. I will go over this and let my mom know not to worry too much, she goes to the kidney doc sometime this week.
                            'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'


                            • #15
                              I had both of my kidney go into renal failure. But I was lukly that they started back on they own. They gave me antibotic and bedrest. The kidney doctor did not know the reason why they stopped and he said he never sean both stop at once. My infection desease doctor thought it was a bladder infection. (((((((((((((((((I)))))))))))))))) hope you mother will get better. Will be prayer for you and your mother and family.

                              Deborah Bush
                              I have IC, the IBS, Heartburn, High bloodpressure,thyrod problems, depression and clorties pain.