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.....because the situation is STUCK...I'll start off by saying things have been better in my life lately. No....I have plain been down right in god awful full body pain. I have IC pain...prettttty much covers 1/4 of my body...on a good day. I've got this mysterious Right arm pain..centers in my elbow anddddd head north and south...Finally...My bone marrow has been replace by concrete. And we haven't talked about the fibro. I am still stuck at 37,,,when i left work..I just turned 42. I guess another 5 years messes with you. I try at the gym, I can increase, but not improve my stamina. I'm so sick of this. And this Narco lepsy ****. What's this all about"|? I haven't changed my meds, I'vd uped a couple because my migraines have been hitting me a like a ton
ON TOP OF ALL THIS...My male sperm donoer for my husband ( ( can't call him a dad he was terrible) Has been an ASS. He insists on standing whereerver I am when I try to clean and he walks right through piles i've swept up and starts painfullh slowly making a sandwich. What the hell. He heard me say to my daughter the other morning..Im gonna sweep , mop and clean the kitchen when you are done. Fine, I read the paper , change my clothes and come out. Bill has the broom and is sweeping. When I sweep, I sweep the edges, under the fridge, into the dining area, pull out chairs, sweep under the table...everything is swept up ..For some reason, and I think it's the same reason he leaps up after dinner so he can control how dishes are put away,he hustled out there as fast as his little wobbly legs could carry him and he swept up about a inch circle and headed for themop. I could see tons of old food under the cabintets, in dining room,under fridge...He had taken the broom with him so as he put it away I took it back out and said ...(now keep in mind, he ALWAYS complains about his eyesight and how he cant see certain angles) so I said, "looks like those darn eyes are playing tricks on you" he looked at me and said "I got everything!" I said "well there is lots of stuff in the cracks under the cabs, and the garbage area is nasty" he took that as a personal attack and as I bent over to pull the can out he threw the broom and sweeping pan at me. I just stared at him and said I wasn't criticising him, it is just hard to see everything. but just because you cant see it doesn't mean it tain't there. He just flung his hand in the air, marched to his room and slammed his door.
Briefly, I felt bad. But I remembered my husband saying he lived his whole life like this, and he guilt tripped everyone. he's trying to make me feel sorry for him by showing me how ****ty of a job he does. But he also wants to do it, let me fix it and tell everyone he did it. He's done that to me many times. I guess b/c it so hard for me to do stuff, I want recognition for it. And my husband knows when I do it. I'm very uptight. I start with wiping a scuff mark off the tile and next this you know, I'm up to my elbows in cleaning fluids. When Bill moved in, and stopped bathing 4 years ago (now), he used to bathe at least twice a week but it has now been FOUR years, I became compulsive about the bathroom and the kitchen. His nose runs when he cooks and the kids gross out (as they should) and when they point it out to him, he says "that's rude" and they say "we agree, it's rude to drop snot into our food" So we don't let him cook now. He is angry about that but his nose constantly runs and he doesn't use tissue or wash his hands.
This is so hard for my husband. He knows he needs to get Bill live elsewhere. No one is happy with the situation.
So,other than hurting like hell, and feeling like I'm a total a ***** in my own home to my poor helpless father in law, all is going well
ON TOP OF ALL THIS...My male sperm donoer for my husband ( ( can't call him a dad he was terrible) Has been an ASS. He insists on standing whereerver I am when I try to clean and he walks right through piles i've swept up and starts painfullh slowly making a sandwich. What the hell. He heard me say to my daughter the other morning..Im gonna sweep , mop and clean the kitchen when you are done. Fine, I read the paper , change my clothes and come out. Bill has the broom and is sweeping. When I sweep, I sweep the edges, under the fridge, into the dining area, pull out chairs, sweep under the table...everything is swept up ..For some reason, and I think it's the same reason he leaps up after dinner so he can control how dishes are put away,he hustled out there as fast as his little wobbly legs could carry him and he swept up about a inch circle and headed for themop. I could see tons of old food under the cabintets, in dining room,under fridge...He had taken the broom with him so as he put it away I took it back out and said ...(now keep in mind, he ALWAYS complains about his eyesight and how he cant see certain angles) so I said, "looks like those darn eyes are playing tricks on you" he looked at me and said "I got everything!" I said "well there is lots of stuff in the cracks under the cabs, and the garbage area is nasty" he took that as a personal attack and as I bent over to pull the can out he threw the broom and sweeping pan at me. I just stared at him and said I wasn't criticising him, it is just hard to see everything. but just because you cant see it doesn't mean it tain't there. He just flung his hand in the air, marched to his room and slammed his door.
Briefly, I felt bad. But I remembered my husband saying he lived his whole life like this, and he guilt tripped everyone. he's trying to make me feel sorry for him by showing me how ****ty of a job he does. But he also wants to do it, let me fix it and tell everyone he did it. He's done that to me many times. I guess b/c it so hard for me to do stuff, I want recognition for it. And my husband knows when I do it. I'm very uptight. I start with wiping a scuff mark off the tile and next this you know, I'm up to my elbows in cleaning fluids. When Bill moved in, and stopped bathing 4 years ago (now), he used to bathe at least twice a week but it has now been FOUR years, I became compulsive about the bathroom and the kitchen. His nose runs when he cooks and the kids gross out (as they should) and when they point it out to him, he says "that's rude" and they say "we agree, it's rude to drop snot into our food" So we don't let him cook now. He is angry about that but his nose constantly runs and he doesn't use tissue or wash his hands.
This is so hard for my husband. He knows he needs to get Bill live elsewhere. No one is happy with the situation.
So,other than hurting like hell, and feeling like I'm a total a ***** in my own home to my poor helpless father in law, all is going well
I wish I could help.
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