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Lost my father yesterday AM

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  • Lost my father yesterday AM

    I am not a frequent poster on here, but I do lurk quite a bit & when I have time I do try to answer questions. I have had IC for years & struggle with depression daily.
    Yesterday my father passed away in Hospice from cancer. We knew it was coming & had plenty of time to say our goodbyes & i love yous. However, this morning I woke up & feel 100x worse than I did yesterday. The pain, the sadness...its hard. I lost my grandma in March 2010, then my grandpa in sept 2010, now my dad in march 2011. Its alot of sadness.
    Just looking for others who lost a parent & how soon you started to feel whole again. I am an only child & my family was very close..its now just my mom & I...I feel very responsible for taking care of her. I do have my own family of 3 kids & a great man, but my duty feels to be with mom.
    Thanks for listening..
    Currently Taking:
    20 mg Celexa
    fentanyl patch 12.5 mcg chgd every 3 days
    morphine IR 15 MG, up to 3x daily
    Xanax 1mg as needed (not taken daily)
    900 MG Oxycarbizine (mood disorder)
    300 MG Welbutrin
    Tizanidine 4 mg up to 20 mg daily as need
    Prevacid 30 mg
    Ambien as needed

    my heating pad is my best friend, use daily on my lower back & pelvic area
    blessed to be able to receive massage & Amma , along with Avazzia therapy 3x weekly

    Been diagnosed for 10 years now, consider myself pretty well versed in this disease & would love to help out with new IC sisters or brothers, feel free to message me.

  • #2
    lost my father

    I am so very sorry to hear about your father.
    I lost my dad several years ago to a malignant brain tumor. Like your dad, his passing was not unexpected and he also was in hospice. I think it took almost a year for me to feel totaly at peace, but it did get better each month.
    Give yourself time and permission to grieve.
    Warm hugs,


    • #3
      i am so sorry for your loss.

      i lost my son in 2007, six weeks later my brother, year after that my mom, then a year after that my sweet sister-inlaw.

      then i get this disease and then recently my husband of 30 years abandons me.

      life is tough and i pray daily and believe that my loved ones are in a much better place.

      i too suffer from severe depression, i read a couple of books that i believe will help you through your grieving the names are( Heaven is for Real) and ( 90 minutes in Heaven).

      God Bless you and he will take care of you, keep in touch.
      <a href=";current=Picture005.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="" border="0" alt="Photobucket" ></a>


      • #4

        I'm so sorry, Karen! The loss of a loved one is never easy.

        Both of my parents are gone now and it still brings me sadness at times when I think of them. Unlike you though, I have siblings and we leaned on each other both times. For me the first year was really hard, but it became easier after that. My sister on the other hand fell into a depression and her deep sadness went on for years. A good therapist can really help with that, something you might consider if it seems overwhelming.

        Again, I am so sorry for your loss!
        "The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have."


        • #5
          I'm so sorry. It's never easy even when it's expected. Time does help. It took me several months after I lost my father before I could think of him any way but sick. Then one day I remembered what a marvelous sense of humor he had --- and in a way I had him back in my memories.

          It's going to be a hard time for your mother, but be sure to listen to her and what she feels she needs in the way of support. She may even need some quiet time away from everyone --- and she will let you know.

          My heart goes out to you.

          Sending gentle hugs,
          Stay safe

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