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My best friend

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  • My best friend

    I have a wonderful friend that is dealing with IC right now.. He is trying to push me away right now.. I assume he feels that he would be a bore to me.. He has told me not to waste my time with him and to go out more.. I have researched this disorder as much as I could.. I'm soo lost.. I have no idea what to do.. I realize that he is in pain.. The lifestyle that I take for granted he dreams of.. I need him to realize that I am there for him.. In every aspect.. I wish sometimes I could just take his hand and take away his pain.. PLEASE help me.. I feel so confused and lost

  • #2
    Hi Kate:

    That is so wonderful that you have taken a interest in your friend..
    I know it is very hard to tell other people about IC, as you look normal from the outside but are very ill inside...

    Kate, my suggestion would be to let him know what you know of IC and give him your support tell him to tell you how he feels, we tend to keep it to ourselves and stay away from others..
    One of the things that come with IC is depression to, so maybe that is why he is pushing you away now!!
    When he wants his space give it to him, he will come to realize that you are a true friend Kate..

    I think it is just wonderful that you are reading up on IC and it is very confusing to understand about the IC pain he is dealing with to..

    My husband is so understanding and is there for me when I need him , so that what I would do for your friend..
    What treatment is he taking for his IC??
    There are lots of things to help his pain if he gets the right doctor that know about IC..

    Go up to the top of this page and click on to where is says ICN Patient Handbook and read about all the different treatments and about the IC diet to help him out..

    He really it lucky to have a friend like you Kate [img]smile.gif[/img] [img]smile.gif[/img]

    Thinking positive has got me through to another day!!


    • #3
      Hi Kate!!!! I wanted to say first of all that you are a very special friend already...

      I know where your friend is coming from though..I spent years 6 to be exact trying to figure out what was wrong with me. I went to Uro. after Uro. and was told in not so flattering terms that it was all in my head...I finally had enough of spending money going to my regular doctor for what I was sure of was urinary tract infection's and being told again and again that nothing was showing up...I finally found another Uro one that was much younger than the other ones. His first response when I told him my syptoms was IC...I feel he was a angel in disguse. I now had a name for the problems I was having. The diagnoses was in March of 2001. I now have the Interstim device. None of the other things worked...not one thing. They told me I have most likely had this for 8 to 10 yrs and had I been treated sooner, some of the other things might have worked.

      None of my friends knew what IC was. And I still have to explain this to other doctors and nurses. I feel I am now hopefully helping others by informing others of this awful disease.

      I believe that maybe once your friend settles into IC he might realize how supportive you are. Maybe he needs time to digest it all. It's even rarer for a man to have this disease. And probly harder for him to take it.

      I know in the last 6 years I felt so many things, like no one wanted to hear my problems and that I was maybe a hypercondrate (spelling), but now I want the world to know what a awful thing we must endure. There is the pain, frequency and so many others. I believe that alot of other things that happen to me are related to the IC. But I am sure that he will come around in time.

      The best thing you can do is read all you can about this and be supportive. Let him know you love and care for him no matter what happens and that you will always be there to lend a ear whenever he needs to vent.

      Thank god for people like you.

      Best of luck
      Patricia [img]smile.gif[/img] [img]smile.gif[/img] [img]cool.gif[/img] [img]cool.gif[/img] [img]wink.gif[/img] [img]wink.gif[/img]