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  • Mothers Day

    Well Mothers day was very hard for me. I was an emoptiol wreck. I had gotten Jamen's (my bf) mother a card that thanked her for acting like a mother to me. She cried and gave me a big hug. Sometimes she can be very annoying but overall I think she knew how hard it was for me yesterday. Not being able to talking to my mother. Well during the day I was wrestling with my mind whether I should send her an e-mail or a text message. I thought I would be the bigger person. So I decided to text her saying Happy mothers day and that I loved her. She sent one back saying thank you and that she misses me and loves me. I started to cry b/c I know she loves me but she shows it in the weirdest way. If she loved me than she would put aside her beliefs and just let me be her daughter despite our differences in religion. I just donte get it and I dont think I ever will.

    Last night I had a dream that I went to my house to pick up the rest of my things... jewlery and clothes and my old photo albums. In my dream she gave me a big hug. and it was just what i needed. When I woke up I felt the need to make my dream a reality. About 2 years ago my mother had sent me an e-mail saying that she was going to clean out my room and throw out my things. If I wanted anything that I should pick them up. Well I didn't b/c I didnt believe she would do that. Today I thought to text message her and ask if she threw my stuff out b/c I wanted to know if I could have my things. She said that she saved some things I might want someday and things my grandma wanted me to have. I have no clue what she's talking about. I'm assuming she save my old bible and teaching sylobsis from church meetings in hope that I would want them and read them and change. But then again she know's the person I am and might have save my albums and pictures. I really wanted those pictures and my old jewlery my parents and grandparents had given me. I'm really curious as to what she saved. I have a feeling she threw out alot of my things. and i think my little sister took my old room. Not that I care but It bothers me. Anyways my mom said she has to dig them out of the cubby and to give her some time to do it. I hope she doesnt forget and that when I go there that it wont be weird.
    I'm kinda of hoping that she will give me a big hug and tell me that she loves me and she wants me home. I hope she wont tell me change my ways and do what they normally do when they see me and make me feel horrible. I hope that god will open her heart and see that what she had done to me is wrong. Please pray for me. I need some extra help today and this week. I'm still recovering from Mothers Day and cant get it out of my head.
    Trying not to make myself flare about this. Thanks for letting me vent. I will keep you posted about what happens.
    Hugs
    Rach
    ***Rachel***

    Dance like no one is watching
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    Dxd with IC in June '06

  • #2
    Rach,
    I am so sorry hun that mothers day was so rough for you.. And yes I applaud you for being the bigger person..It saddens me to know end to know your mother just cannot accept you.. I know she does not have to accept your beliefs but I strongly think she should still have a relationship with you regarless of what you believe in.. You are her flesh and blood.. But I think you already know how I feel about your situation..There is so many mothers out there that would love to have a daughter like you.. You are very sweet and always trying to help and give advise for people who are need on the boards..You are a great person.. Like I have said before its not you that has the problem its your family..I wish you all the luck in the world when you go and get your things.. But hun PLEASE dont get your hopes up to high about your mom and the hug.. But you know like I said to you are the bigger person in this situation if it was me I would go up to her and hug her if she does not respond at least you tried..Please let me know how it goes..BIG HUGS for you((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGSSS))))))))))))) )))))))))..oops didnt mean to squeeze you so hard...

    Ronda
    Hugs
    Ronda

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    • #3
      I truly hope your wishes come true. I hope that whatever the feud is about that you both can put it behind you.

      We are not blessed with every day, even if we think that we will be here tomorrow. You never know what might happen. I'm not trying to make u feel any worse at all....I just know from experience.

      I have had alot of issues in the past and I just finally had to be very honest with myself and my mom. I told her one day Mom, I'm an adult and this is my life. I'm going to mess up but I will also make u proud. So please just be there for me and don't be mad at me about the little things.

      My dad passed away when I was 15 years old. It was the hardest thing for me....I was a daddy's girl and we went threw a really rough time.

      I last saw my dad on his death bed....he litarlly held on for me to get there. Then a couple of weeks later he was gone. I was able to say that I was sorry for alot that I had done. He wasn't able to say anything cause he had...I think 7 strokes so he couldn't talk. But I will tell you what he was in his right mind....as my grandma said. The first time I saw him and when he saw me....his eyes never left my face. I could tell that he truly loved me just threw his eyes.

      So please from someone that has lost a parent just do what you can on your part and then just know that is all you can do.

      Take care and I wish you the best!!!
      Live your life to YOUR best, and Love to YOUR best!!!



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      • #4

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        • #5
          Big Hugs Sandra
          "Never Give Up."

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          • #6
            I'm so sorry you are being shunned by your family. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you. I'm sure your mother does love you.

            Sending gentle hugs,
            Donna
            Stay safe


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            • #7
              Rachel...I have been reading your posts for some time now and wanted to tell you that I am so sorry this is happening to you. (((hugs)))
              Sharon

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              • #8
                Hugs to you

                Rachael,

                Sending big hugs your way! I am so sorry for what you are going through and I hope that the meeting goes well for you.

                While I do see my mother, there are a lot of issues there for me and my siblings and we tend to let them stay under the rug because we feel that even if we tried to talk to her, it would get us no where. That comes from years of experience with her.

                I sympathize with your problem as I have changed religions since I left homes many years ago and while she has not disowned me, she has not been as accepting of me either. A good example was my son's baptism. I did not tell her about it because he would be sprinkled rather than immersed and to her that is not baptism. I told her afterwards and she asked why she wasn't invited and I explained that I didn't think that she would approve and I didn't want the day ruined for us and she agreed with me that she didn't approved.

                That is just one little for instance, and my heart goes out to you. I will keep you in my prayers and hope for the very best for you. Everyone needs family and like you, my mother-in-law was so like a mother to me and she passed last year. I missed her so this mother's day.

                Hang in there and the best of luck. Hopefully by her saving your things, something good can come out of this for you, I have no doubt she loves you very much.

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