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Argument has started off a terrible day...

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  • mary124
    replied
    We all have money problems at one time or another- whether we are young or old. Men somehow, don't understand that bills come first- then the fun stuff. I'm trying to get the rest of the money together to pay the house payment and the lights- hate to see the light bill because everytime I get home, they have it on 75 or so-- they like it comfortable. (well, if they want to pay the bills, thats fine with me!!- give me some more money!!) Plus on top of all of this, the refrig is trying to die on us!! (first it was the washer now this!) oh well, life is exciting!!
    Glad your appointment went well.

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  • humpieumpumkin
    replied
    Kristi-It sure is alot of responsibility to pay the family finances! Its nice to know someone can relate. I don't know what men have the right now mindset, but they are so terrible at delaying gratification. All or nothing type of thinking I guess.

    RAS6-I actually have PMDD, and get SEVERE anxiet/panic attacts with the slightest things before my period. It is severe enough to interrupt my life-yuck. I'm quite stable other wise, but an a "worrier". It is not an attention seeking behavior, it is a hormonal/chemical inbalance. I LOVE the interstim. Read my posts about it and ask me all the questions you want. I am about 97% improved! Before the implant I had severe frequency, urgency, and moderate pain. My pain was pressure and a crushing feeling on my tummy-especially at night. I also had painful urgency. Burning on urination was also a huge issue. I now have no pain(maybe slight pressure once a week) and my voids are down to 5-8x a day! I have to say its not FDA approved for pain, but since you have the urinary symptoms too it could sure help. I didn't really think the surgery was a big deak at all. I think its worth a shot-if the trial wont work, simply don't get the permanent implant. You really don't have much to lose. Surgery is surgery though, and there are always risks associated with going under, but hey its worth a shot!

    Erika

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  • KristiV
    replied
    Another one here! I am 27 and married and am also the money manager of the family. My husband is obsessed with clothes and looking good. He has more shoes than I do. I am thinking he has close to 60 pairs of shoes and I am a school teacher. You do the math. Thank goodness he has a good job! We have not had a fight in a long time about money, but I have tried to let him spend a little here and there. Which let me tell you is extremely tough for me. But, he has given in too. He does not go on shopping binges as much now. Jake needs to give in a little, all you were asking for was to wait one day. Hope everything works out!

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  • RAS6
    replied
    Totally Understand!

    Oh my gosh Erika, it sounds like we are dealing with the same stuff with our men. If you read the post "Why do they hurt us" you'll know me and my hubby have been fighting over stupid money issues. He wants to live like he did before we had kids and now with my illness and having to spend at least $200 a month on meds and visits (sometimes more) along with the fact that I can only work part time, he gets mad whenever I tell him "no". He wants to get what he wants and not wait! And then he says how miserable I am. So I really do get it, it sucks and it isn't fair! I don't know about you, but I have pain and frequency and urgency basically all the time, I am just feeling like an emotional wreck. And yes, any stress (even if it just a stupid fight over money, or forgetting to buy milk while I was out, or something little like that) does make all my symptoms worse. And I get panic attacks too (which he sometimes thinks are just me being' crazy' or seeking attention) and I understand how all that wory can just overcome you at once. So don't feel bad about venting! This is the best place to do it. Everyone gets it and no one here judges you.
    Actually I am so glad I found your post! I am now looking into interstim. I haven't set a date or anything, but after a few more meds I know my Doc wants me to try it. I am at least trying to get info now. I may PM you with ?'s it you don't mind. You are the first person around my age (I think you are anyways, I'm 25) that I have heard is getting it. I could be wrong, but most of the ladies I know who have it are older and while that isn't really a factor, I am just nervous about getting this at such a young age.
    Anyways, I hope you are feeling better now. I don't work customer service like you, I work with kids, but feeling nasty can really affect your day, especially when you have to stay patient and smiling!
    Take care!

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  • tigger_gal
    replied
    I am so sorry your day started so bad, we have them days too. Sending you huge hugs. I hope your appt goes well, and your day is getting better.

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  • humpieumpumkin
    replied
    Thats a good point...I'm in banking myself, so in order to keep my job, my credit needs to stay very good. I am also the money manager in the relationship, and pay all the bills. He has no idea what the finances look like, although I show him acct balances frequently. If we separated he would not know what bill he had or how to pay them Its like having a kid haha

    Erika

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  • SandyRN
    replied
    If you get into another money argument, you might use that line about being responsible and that you only want to make sure that things run smoothly in your household. Being in a financial bind is one surefire way to ruin a relationship...I can tell you that from personal experience. You're doing the right thing!

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  • humpieumpumkin
    replied
    Thanks Sandy I never thought about it that way...

    Erika

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  • SandyRN
    replied
    I know how you feel. Right now we are doing ok financially, but this is one of the only times in my life that I've not had to worry where the cash for the bills is going to come from. It's HARD to get yourself into a position where you know, for certain, that every month is going to be covered and you'll have enough cash to feed yourselves, have water, power, phone, etc, not to mention all the healthcare costs, GAS (which is RIDICULOUS), etc etc etc. The only thing I can tell you is that it is hard when you're young and starting out. You don't have the savings stored up like you do when you're getting a bit older...sigh. I spent most of my adult life worrying about money. All I can say is it does get better eventually. It almost seems like being young means you have to struggle to get by sometimes.

    Please don't feel bad about the way you reacted. It shows you are a responsible woman who wants to make sure every one of your responsibilities are taken care of. It shows good character, and you should be proud of that!

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  • humpieumpumkin
    replied
    Thanks for all the support ladies, you have gotten me half way through the day. I have tried to forget the bs of this morning. My hormones send me for a loop and in only 22~! I do have some good news, my uro just told me I don't have to see him for a year unless I need a reprogram or get a uti:woohoo: Finally I feel like a "normal" person again! Thanks everyone!

    Erika

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  • petrie86
    replied
    Erika,
    Oh Lord do I stress over $$ all the time! I live on my own so it's always a problem with me. I spend my money on usless s*** and then wonder where all my money when then i stress out. I have a huge problem but I understand where your coming from.
    Jake shouldnt have asked you for money for a stupid hair cut! It's not a necessary right now, it can always wait. Hell i've needed a trim for about 2 months now lol. Dont let Jake put you in a bad mood. It's not worth getting upset about.
    I hope your appt goes well... and feel better. Let me know if there's anything I can do for ya!

    Hugs
    Rach

    Leave a comment:


  • traceann
    replied
    Count me in as one who goes into panic mode over $$!! Right now things are tighter than normal, and I find myself stressing out a month in advance over making mortgage payments, insurance payments etc. You aren't alone! And now, I am accts payable at work sooooo, I get to stress over paying bills here too!!! LMAO! No matter where I go, work or home - I can't escape!

    And here's to hoping that appt goes well!!!

    HUGS!

    Leave a comment:


  • dancemomof2
    replied
    I am sure your day will get better. We all have these days. I know when money is tight here things tend to get more tense then they usually are and men don't seem to worry as much about it as we do.

    Good luck at you follow up appointment!

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  • ICNDonna
    replied
    I hope your check-up goes well. And that tomorrow is a better day.

    Donna

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  • GriffsMommy
    replied
    (((((((Erika))))))))) I'm sorry that your day started out so crappy. I stress out about money all the time too. Honestly what always helps me is to sit down and see what I can pay now and what has to wait. Usually once I look at it all and figure it out it's never as bad as I thought it was. I always have more money than I think I do.

    As for Jake, I'm sure he'll get over it, who cares if he gets his hair cut today or tomorrow after he gets paid. I hope your follow up appt goes well at least

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