Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Jen's Tips for Great IC Sex

Collapse
This is a sticky topic.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #31
    Awesome Tips Jen!

    The absolute best lube I have ever used is Eros silicone but it's very expensive. Next in line which is the one I use most often ID Glide silicone lube. Never, ever sticky, feels like silk. But you can't find either of these in the drug store, you have to go an erotic shop or sex shop for it. If you're too shy to go to a sex shop I'm sure you could order it online.

    I have been using lube long, long before any this stupid ic crap came about and I've tried at least 20 different kinds.

    Comment


    • #32
      Hey Pernie -- those are good lubes too. Yes, you can buy them online -- for anyone who wishes to do that, I know that Good Vibrations at http://www.goodvibes.com has at least one of the lubes mentioned -- it's a great store created for women by women. I believe http://www.drugstore.com actually carries some good lubes as well. They have a Sexual Health section that's pretty good for a "drugstore"!
      ****
      Jen

      *Diagnosed with severe IC in 2004
      *Also diagnosed with PFD, fibromyalgia, chronic myofascial pain, IBS, migraines, allergies/asthma, dermatographism
      *Kept trying a million different treatments for all these things until I found what works, and I am doing okay these days with the help of a cocktail of medications and the InterStim, which was first placed in 2007. [I have had 2 revisions - one in 2010 when my battery died and had to be replaced, and one complete replacement (lead and generator) in 2012 after a fall on my stairs caused my lead to move.]
      *Current meds include Atarax (50mg at night), Lyrica (150mg twice a day), Xanax (0.5mg at night and as needed), Zanaflex (4mg at night), hydrocodone (10/325, every 6 hours as needed), Advair, Nasonex, Singulair (10mg at night), oral contraceptives, home instills containing Elmiron and Marcaine (as often as I need to do them).

      **I am not a medical authority nor do I offer definitive medical advice. I strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

      Comment


      • #33
        what do people use prior to sex(intercourse) to help with the muscles hypertonicity? are narcotics or muscle relaxants more effective? my MD is willing to prescribe either one, and I am curious what works for others? this is not a pressing issue as i'm not currently in a relationship, but I'd like to have a clue when/if that happens!!! the few times i've had vicodin after a procedure, it just made me nauseous and a bit dizzy. I'd rather feel "loose," even if i'm a bit loopy for a few hours!

        Comment


        • #34
          If you eat a piece of bread or two before you take the Vicodin it won't make you nauseous. I have a very sensitive stomache and eating right before you take it is the trick.

          Comment


          • #35
            Hey!
            I read a lot of your posts and I'v tryed some of the things you all have suggested but iv also read that you have orgasams usually even if it might be painfull. I'v been with two diffrent men and iv never been able to have an orgasam. Iv had IC sence I was about 11 years old now I'm 18. Can anyone help or suggest anything??? My poor boyfriend of 3 1/2 years can't understand why iv never had one!
            Thanks
            Kalie

            Comment


            • #36
              Jodi
              Hi and nice to meet you.
              I can relate and sympathise. I have the surrounding pelvic pain with intercorse
              too and it feels like he is hitting something. The pain is unbelievable.........
              I am so sorry you feel this its horrible........my dr. told me that the bladder
              could be hit during intercorse and made no big deal out of it......Im not sure what
              could be done and I know I have tried lube and positions........both work well
              and the positions make a major difference so find the positions that work for you and as hard as it is know that just because a position hurt last time doesnt mean it will this time.........

              Rhonda G

              Comment


              • #37
                Hi Kalie and welcome to the ICN! I am so sorry you have had to deal with IC since you were so young, ugh, that's a drag! The difficulty with orgasm - is it because you are afraid of pain possibly, so therefore you can't relax enough? I know this might sound a bit personal, but if you are able to have an orgasm through masturbation, you may just be having a hard time relaxing with your partner. Fear can be a strong motivator - it's amazing what it can do to us!!! If it hurts to have one, that's a pretty strong motivator to NOT have one, lol. Your body just may be saying "no way!!"

                I do know that the positions and lubrications we use help with actual intercourse, so as to take pressure off our bladders, keep aggrivation of the vulvar and urethral areas to a minimum etc. But honestly, orgasm can be a whole different ballgame, One is not usually too conducive to the other, unfortunately!!!!

                I hope this helps a little bit

                Hugs!
                Hugs,
                Tracey
                How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time...

                Harry arrived 2/23/09!



                *IC Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

                IC Diet Cheat Sheet:
                http://www.ic-network.com/diet/2009icdietlist.pdf



                Dx's:
                IC dx'd Nov 2004
                Lymphocytic Colitis dx'd July 2005
                Possible IBS
                Current IC Meds
                Vistaril 25mg in the evening
                Previous IC Meds taken:
                Cystoprotek - 2 caps 2x's a day
                Elmiron, 100mg 3x's a day
                Ditropan, 5 mg 3x's a day
                Others:
                Wellbutrin 150mg 2x's a day for Anxiety/IBS
                Pepcid 40mg a day for GERD
                Zytrec for Nasal Allergies
                Align Probiotic daily for IBS

                Comment


                • #38
                  If I may offer a suggestion, it sounds like you might have a tilted uterus. Mine is tilted forward instead of backward and I get zapped when my husband goes in as far as he can (something I insist he not do!). It's hard to put a tampon in, and having sex from the rear is terribly uncomfortable. Just a thought.

                  Jen

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    I have the same problem also with my boyfriend hitting somthing in my body also.. sometimes it gets so tender and it hurts so badly that during sex i have to curl up in a ball if he hits a really sensitive area...it feels like someone is just poking ur insides roughly..sex just isn't exciting at all when u have that kind of pain..
                    kalie

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Something else my dr. told me that others might want to think about.......

                      Sounds like most all the pain I have with sex has been summed up by all of you and your symptoms. I can only feel that its due to IC.
                      Everyones tip of positions and lubricants is all any of us have except the mind over matter which I believe pays a major roll......if we are not relaxed the tension will make us hurt if nothing else does.........and we all know long term pain causes fear that is next to impossible to put out of our minds........

                      On the other hand......
                      My Dr. told me that the fear and tension causes me to hold my muscles in the vaginal area tensed and tight.......like your shoulder and neck muscles when your stressed........Long term this has resulted in always holding those muscles tight like its a natural, 24 hr. a day way to hold those muscles resulting in pain as well.......
                      His recommendation is also the same we have discussed here as far as lubs and positions but also couples therapy........you can go for therapy or your gyn. can show you and your partner how to massage those muscles to get them relaxed and it is recommended prior to intercorse.......
                      Its difficult for me because everything has taken any desire for intimacy or sex from me but Im hoping that the couples therapy can turn that back on for me........
                      I just had my cys. and lap. done 5 weeks ago and received my IC diagnosis.......on Wed. I see my dr. for the 4 wk post op checkup........if given the permission to have intercorse again we will then begin our couples therapy........wish us luck
                      I hope this can help you guys in this area......
                      and thanks from the bottom of my heart for all you guys and your support.

                      Rhonda G

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        My lord, we all have the same problems! My therapist looks at me like I am insane when I try to explain the "hitting something" pain. I should tell her to read this thread!!!

                        Regarding lubrication, my doctor told me last year to start using plain 'ol Vegetable Oil. I have VV as well and get very irritated from most things I have tried. The vege oil is cheap and works awesome!!!! Plus it's kinda fun, it is certainly worth a try!! But throw down an old sheet or something cause it gets everywhere!
                        Wendi
                        IC symptoms began in 1975; diagnosed in March 2006.
                        Other conditions: PFD, Migraine, VV, Total Abd Hysterectormy on 12/27,06 for Cervical Cancer, Fibromyalgia.
                        Current Daily Meds: Roxicet, Methadone, Flexoril, Flomax
                        I use Prayer, Yoga, Relaxation Breathing and TENS to help relieve stress, anxiety and pain- LOTS of make up to hide my true identity!

                        myspace page:www.myspace.com/armslee

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          Originally posted by armslee
                          My lord, we all have the same problems! My therapist looks at me like I am insane when I try to explain the "hitting something" pain. I should tell her to read this thread!!!

                          Regarding lubrication, my doctor told me last year to start using plain 'ol Vegetable Oil. I have VV as well and get very irritated from most things I have tried. The vege oil is cheap and works awesome!!!! Plus it's kinda fun, it is certainly worth a try!! But throw down an old sheet or something cause it gets everywhere!

                          Welcome ARMSLEE
                          WOW
                          I realy was beginning to think I was a nut. Thank God I found you guys, ha ha.
                          Veg. oil ? Something about using that kinda scares me......
                          I get so irritated over everything.......I tend to stay away from things that
                          were not ment for that area......I might try it.......I just know irritation being the result of somethings keeps from trying anything knew.......
                          Makes since though......I remember in teen yrs. when I wasnt such a nut that baby oil worked very well.........

                          RhondaG

                          Comment


                          • #43
                            saw my dr. for the 4 wk. follow up after surgery and start of meds.
                            All checked out well and Im beginning to get a handle on the IC and IBS flares since surgery.
                            My hunny and I had intercorse for the first time after surgery and it had been about 8 weeks or so since anyway.......
                            We tried the therapy and it worked.......I know when the dr. lasered the scar tissue during surgery........that was the biggest help of all for the pain during intercorse but there were still some muscles that were tensed and although the pain wasnt near as bad after the surgery..........the muscles still hurt......my hunny followed drs. massage technique and it relaxed those muscles to the point that I didnt feel pain at all.......a miracle for me and I had forgotton what "NORMAL" sex was suppose to feel like........
                            It was great and I felt like sending my dr. a dozen roses, ha ha........

                            Rhonda G

                            Comment


                            • #44
                              I don't know what to do about that "have to go" feeling during the act. My husband is all about me, and he likes to take his time to please me. But, as soon as ten minutes pass, I have to go again. So, I tell him and I go...and we continue. We have to start all over in getting in the mood...and of course, ten minutes later...I have to go again. It's driving me crazy. As pathetic as it is...these days I'm happier if we just do it quickly. Plus, the more time goes on, the more sore my areas are and I can't find it pleasurable.

                              I like to take a shower or bath prior for my own cleansing needs and to try to relax the muscles...but I have a tachycardia problem. So, when I get out of the tub, I feel like I'm ready to pass out.

                              I'm going to try with this list and see if that helps any with the urgency with sex. Maybe if I just take a shower an hour or so before hand, I might not be so sick. Thanks for all the tips Jen.
                              Diagnosis: IC, IBS, GERD, Posturial orthostatic tachycardia syndrome, chronic folliculitis, right sided aortic arch, atrial septal anuerysm, ankylosing spondylitis, TMJ

                              Comment


                              • #45
                                Originally posted by icjen
                                I don't know what to do about that "have to go" feeling during the act. My husband is all about me, and he likes to take his time to please me. But, as soon as ten minutes pass, I have to go again. So, I tell him and I go...and we continue. We have to start all over in getting in the mood...and of course, ten minutes later...I have to go again. It's driving me crazy. As pathetic as it is...these days I'm happier if we just do it quickly. Plus, the more time goes on, the more sore my areas are and I can't find it pleasurable.

                                I like to take a shower or bath prior for my own cleansing needs and to try to relax the muscles...but I have a tachycardia problem. So, when I get out of the tub, I feel like I'm ready to pass out. I'm going to try with this list and see if that helps any with the urgency with sex. Maybe if I just take a shower an hour or so before hand, I might not be so sick. Thanks for all the tips Jen.
                                Taking a bath/shower an hour before may be helpful. You may also want to try relaxation tapes after the bath/shower (that may help to relax the pelvic floor muscles). In addition, using a cold pack on the pelvic area prior to intercourse may help to quiet the nerves that cause you to feel frequency.

                                Consult with your healthcare provider to see if these suggestions are appropriate self-help techniques for you.

                                Good luck, ICB
                                Last edited by ICB; 07-06-2006, 12:15 PM.

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X