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Tigger GAL: I am here with questions

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  • Tigger GAL: I am here with questions I've thought about coming to this section but had no idea where to start. for the last 3 years my husband and have lived as roommates, no intamacy, which leads to little affection and closeness. My loneliness and confusion is making me sick and I've tried talking to him about it saying there are so many different ways of having sex (hell, we weren't exactly missionary position anyway) but he says he's afraid of hurting me. (I'm very small anatomically and well,...he's not) SO, I've tried and tried, during times that he was seemingly relaxed and he's just said no. I know he waits til I'm conked out on meds then watches "stuff" or whatever for his own gratification. I'm ok until weekends, I am absolutely lonely, I don't think he truly understands what this is doing to me. I'm not half bad looking, (my 17 year old is always freaking out because when we go out together she notices men my age checking me out...I don't notice, I tell her she's paranoid, but she says "they give you a sweet smile then look at your butt as you go past...I should know, I'm in high school!!!!) She always says "they're so old but cute...('ll be in your late 30's early 40's too some day ).
    I don't know...he tells me I'm paranoid, he has so much work to do, once he finishes X, or Y...But he never he goes to the movies with me. He promised a weekend away as a Christmas present but keeps putting it off.

    Anyway...have any of you had this problem? if so how would you deal with this?

    I.C. DX'd following my "second hysterectomy" (the remaining ovary, that kept bursting and bleeding 2 years after my hyster/right oompherectomy, was removed in 2003. I was a special ed teacher. I am now very lost, and feeling rather hopeless in my life.

    Medications I CURRENTLY take:
    90 mgs Ms contin (45 mgs Am/PM)
    Percocet as needed
    Topomax 100mg day
    Ambien 10 mg bed
    desipramine 25 mgs

    If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
    Albert Einstein

  • #2
    It may be time for you to talk with a marriage counselor. And if your husband won't go, go without him.

    Warm encouraging hugs,
    Stay safe

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    • #3
      I am so sorry he is doing this to you.. He is just being so unfair to your feelings. You can be lonley all alone easier then being alone with him there..

      i am going to send you a pm.
      'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'