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  • flare every time

    Ok, so I'm to the point where sex stresses me out. every time my hubby and I do it, it hurts. two days later I can count on a flare. He doesn't want to hurt me, and he feels bad, so our sex life sucks. I always flare around Ovulation and that is when we need to do it! I hate this, my sex life is awful. Never been the case for me. it is painful and hard. How are we ever going to get pregnant? I can't even bear to think about it-just when I get my bladder calmed down we have sex and I'm flaring! Soooo frustrated!

  • #2
    hey there

    I know this maybe a stupid question but have you looked at the tips on this section....they are very good....
    make sure to have a really good lubricant and also have either painkillers before and/or after and/or antispasmodics for overactive bladder like oxybutinin and/or muscle relaxants.....
    i find that if i make sure i use a cool cloth after too it really helps me out....
    it may help you too....
    i find that the lubricant 'slippery stuff' is good...
    just search for it and you can find it online but i can't find one that isn't a sales site.....
    but yeah you can't have too much lubricant and you can just take your 'rescue meds' before and/or after and it should be a lil more comfy....
    i hope this helps...
    Have dealt with chronic pain and gerd/ibs since '98 endometriosis, vulvodynia diagnosed 2000, ic diagnosed around 2004, chronic epstein barr-like virus 2011
    Hysterectomy/oophorectomy 2014 endo had destroyed everything
    Now dealing with recurrence and menopause in late 30s
    Other things--migraines, chronic hives, eczema, raynauds, congenital scoliosis, broke 3 vertebrae in middle of back when i was 16, heart defect (ventrical septal defect)

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    • #3
      My doc. hasn't given me anything and prosed, Utira C, pyridium, all those make me dizzy to the point I can't do anything. Not sure what is worse, peeing every 10 minutes or getting dizzy. I use ice packs immediately after, pee, shower, lube, all of the above. But since we are trying to get pregnant I can't be on anything like you mentioned. Thus, it makes it nearly impossible to handle a flare. Thanks though!

      Comment


      • #4
        hey again

        actually the oxybutinin is only a category B with pregnancy so you could have it at least till you get pregnant or if you feel comfy with it then take it every so often....detrol is a category C so thats not good....
        and also flexeril is a category B too so its ok to have when trying to get pregnant....
        here are the links....
        http://www.drugs.com/pro/flexeril.html
        quote 'Pregnancy
        Pregnancy Category B: Reproduction studies have been performed in rats, mice and rabbits at doses up to 20 times the human dose, and have revealed no evidence of impaired fertility or harm to the fetus due to Flexeril. There are, however, no adequate and well-controlled studies in pregnant women. Because animal reproduction studies are not always predictive of human response, this drug should be used during pregnancy only if clearly needed.
        Nursing Mothers
        It is not known whether this drug is excreted in human milk. Because cyclobenzaprine is closely related to the tricyclic antidepressants, some of which are known to be excreted in human milk, caution should be exercised when Flexeril is administered to a nursing woman.'
        http://www.drugs.com/pro/ditropan.html
        heres a quote 'Pregnancy
        Category B. Reproduction studies using oxybutynin chloride in the hamster, rabbit, rat, and mouse have shown no definite evidence of impaired fertility or harm to the animal fetus. The safety of Ditropan administered to women who are or who may become pregnant has not been established. Therefore, Ditropan should not be given to pregnant women unless, in the judgment of the physician, the probable clinical benefits outweigh the possible hazards.
        Nursing Mothers
        It is not known whether this drug is excreted in human milk. Because many drugs are excreted in human milk, caution should be exercised when Ditropan is administered to a nursing woman.'
        heres the one on detrol that is not good to have.......
        http://www.drugs.com/pro/detrol.html
        quote 'Pregnancy Category C
        At oral doses of 20 mg/kg/day (approximately 14 times the human exposure), no anomalies or malformations were observed in mice. When given at doses of 30 to 40 mg/kg/day, tolterodine has been shown to be embryolethal, reduce fetal weight, and increase the incidence of fetal abnormalities (cleft palate, digital abnormalities, intra-abdominal hemorrhage, and various skeletal abnormalities, primarily reduced ossification) in mice. At these doses, the AUC values were about 20- to 25-fold higher than in humans. Rabbits treated subcutaneously at a dose of 0.8 mg/kg/day achieved an AUC of 100 µg∙h/L, which is about 3-fold higher than that resulting from the human dose. This dose did not result in any embryotoxicity or teratogenicity. There are no studies of tolterodine in pregnant women. Therefore, Detrol should be used during pregnancy only if the potential benefit for the mother justifies the potential risk to the fetus.
        Nursing Mothers
        Tolterodine is excreted into the milk in mice. Offspring of female mice treated with tolterodine 20 mg/kg/day during the lactation period had slightly reduced body weight gain. The offspring regained the weight during the maturation phase. It is not known whether tolterodine is excreted in human milk; therefore, Detrol should not be administered during nursing. A decision should be made whether to discontinue nursing or to discontinue Detrol in nursing mothers.'
        and heres to explain the drug categories for pregnancy...
        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pregnancy_category
        (i know some people don't like wikipedia but this is the simplest way to figure them out so that is why i picked this as a link)

        so i hope this helps ya out....
        take care
        and good luck
        Have dealt with chronic pain and gerd/ibs since '98 endometriosis, vulvodynia diagnosed 2000, ic diagnosed around 2004, chronic epstein barr-like virus 2011
        Hysterectomy/oophorectomy 2014 endo had destroyed everything
        Now dealing with recurrence and menopause in late 30s
        Other things--migraines, chronic hives, eczema, raynauds, congenital scoliosis, broke 3 vertebrae in middle of back when i was 16, heart defect (ventrical septal defect)

        Comment


        • #5
          Thanks. I'm having a rough day, found out I didn'dt get a job I wanted, and I'm getting laid off in a month. Its gonna be hard with the economy...and i'm in a bad flare. I want to be intimate and then boom, pain. I have an appt. tomorrow with the urogyn. I'll see what I can find out! thanks sooooo much for educating me. I'm still new to this (even though I've been dealing with IC for 10 years....)

          Comment


          • #6
            hey there

            your welcome....
            well we IC-ers got to stick together....its us against the condition we got and the docs....
            and i am on here enough and you can't learn too much so it was no problem..
            i hope it helped ya out and now you can ask your doc about other things too to maybe take when pregnant if you need them....
            i hope all goes well
            take care
            Have dealt with chronic pain and gerd/ibs since '98 endometriosis, vulvodynia diagnosed 2000, ic diagnosed around 2004, chronic epstein barr-like virus 2011
            Hysterectomy/oophorectomy 2014 endo had destroyed everything
            Now dealing with recurrence and menopause in late 30s
            Other things--migraines, chronic hives, eczema, raynauds, congenital scoliosis, broke 3 vertebrae in middle of back when i was 16, heart defect (ventrical septal defect)

            Comment


            • #7
              My doct wants to stay away from giving me more and more stuff. Orally, so she has me get neurontin cream and gave me some lidocane. So far, no improvement and the lidcane didn't seem that numbing. Not sure if I'm doing it right? I'll keep these medications for later. Wnat to keep my body clear for babies nad take a pain management approach. THANKS!

              Comment


              • #8
                I have tried lidocaine just before sex and it takes away the pain during sex. Also we avoid the missionary position (although it is my personal favorite) since that seems to flare most of our bladders the most. If you are afraid of meds, try a very warm bath after sex. Some people prefer an ice pack, but I am definetly a heat person. Also try sleeping with a heating pad between your legs and on your bladder. This all helps, makes my flares less intense and shorter. If you are willing to try meds. I have found that valium suppositores (or low oral doses) to work best. Even taking two tylenol about an hour before sex or right after will help. Good luck, I think the sex thing is the worst part about IC and causes the most problems and then causes us stress and that causes flares. It is a vicious cycle! But we work constantly to make things better and there are lots of tips on this website that are wonderful. good luck to you

                Comment


                • #9
                  One thing I discovered is once my IC was more "controlled" the flares from sex didn't last as long. I never attempt to have sex during flares. I also soak in a warm bath immediately after. Since you are trying to have a baby - have you tried instillations (since you can't take many of the other meds)? Are you on the IC diet? Also - I simply can not do the missionary position - I have to be in a position where I can "control" things a bit more - and I always use lubrication. This is one of those times that it's ok to say - IC sucks. Sending gentle ((((hugs)))) your way.

                  DX IC Aug 2007 -DX PFD July 2007
                  Severe Allergies since 18 months old
                  Meds:Aterax 25 mg @ night (only during allergy season - now)
                  Valium 2.5 to 5 mg 2x per day for PFD
                  Elavil 50 mg @ night
                  Bladder Instillations (at home) 3x per week -
                  My recipe is: Lidocaine, Heparin and Sodium Bicarb
                  _____________________________________________
                  Meds I could not tolerate: Elmiron and Lyrica

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