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  • #16
    Tig...
    You should never feel guilty of what you have done. You know in your heart you are doing whats best for Jake..Think of it this way..You would feel alot more guilty if your neice and her boyfriend had Jake and was abusing him or neglecting him..You need to think of this as a postive thing that you and your husband has done..

    I think Donnas idea about the little story is a great idea..You can also write Jake a letter and tell him your feelings and emotions about the whole adopting process and give to him when hes older and starts asking questions..

    I do believe Jake should know who his mom is, and when he gets older he should know the truth why you adopted him.

    I do want to applaud you and your husband for having the courage to proceed with the adoption.

    And just remember anyone can be a mother, but it takes a special person to
    be a mommy:

    Hugss girly...

    Ps.. Please have no guilt, because you have probably saved that babies life..
    Last edited by leelee88; 03-12-2007, 06:27 AM.
    Hugs
    Ronda

    ONE Second, ONE Bite, ONE Breath, ONE Pill, ONE Minute, ONE Teardrop, ONE Hour, ONE Sip.. ONE DAY! I will Prevail from this disease! IC Hoping for a Cure!


    Link to Patient Handbook:
    http://www.ic-network.com/handbook/

    Diet Reference Sheet:
    http://www.ic-network.com/diet/icndi...tsheet0909.pdf

    Meds For IC: Lyrica-25mg Glucosamine-500 MSM-500mg, Prosed Ds -When Flaring

    Other Meds: Levlite- Continious Birtcontrol, Micardis-40mg for High Blood Pressure

    Meds I have Tried:
    Topamax,Tofranil, Elmiron, Atarax, Cymbalta, Elavil, Enablex, Detral La, Prydium.
    Lexapro< Bad reaction to this med!
    Intstills, could not continue them due to some kind of reaction after 3rd instill. Tasted the lidocaine in my mouth, tongue and lips went numb then went into what seemed like a panic attack. Shaking, racing heart, tingling face/head, blood pressure shot up..

    Dx With IC in Nov 2006 with Hydro/Cysto
    Hydro/Cysto Caused Bladder to Rupture.

    Other Dxs-Vulvodynia,Fibro, Endo, IBS, HPV, Migraines, Spastic Colon, Mild Dysplasia.



    ICN Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

    Comment


    • #17
      I not going to vote on this, but I don't think its wrong for Jake to call you and your husband "Mommy" and "Daddy". After all, you are raising him. There is a difference in a birth Mom.
      My Sister is in a similar situtation like you are. Her daughter pretty much wants nothing to do with her children -- so they live with their Grandma. She lives there part time, when she gets tired of the boyfriend. Kids are confused. Sometimes they call Grandma, "Grandma" and sometimes "Momma"
      When their Mom is their she tries to correct them and tell them that she is their Mom and they say No! It is so sad.

      Donna is right, write a sorry about Jake, kids love that kind of thing and read it to him all the time. He will never get tired of it.

      Comment


      • #18
        I am just so proud that you are taking care of that precious little angel

        Let him call you what he wants. The name does not really matter because he knows you all love him and are the ones who take care of him

        You are a true angel yourself
        Miss Bessie

        Galatians 6:2 - Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

        Hebrews 13:2 - Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by doing so some people have entertained angels without knowing it.

        Proverbs 4:23 - Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life

        Comment


        • #19
          thank you girls.. 3 weeks and 4 day until the termination hearing.. only 4 visits left including today..
          'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

          Comment


          • #20
            Good luck with today chickie!!!! Will be thinking of you!
            Hugs,
            Tracey
            How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time...

            Harry arrived 2/23/09!



            *IC Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

            IC Diet Cheat Sheet:
            http://www.ic-network.com/diet/2009icdietlist.pdf



            Dx's:
            IC dx'd Nov 2004
            Lymphocytic Colitis dx'd July 2005
            Possible IBS
            Current IC Meds
            Vistaril 25mg in the evening
            Previous IC Meds taken:
            Cystoprotek - 2 caps 2x's a day
            Elmiron, 100mg 3x's a day
            Ditropan, 5 mg 3x's a day
            Others:
            Wellbutrin 150mg 2x's a day for Anxiety/IBS
            Pepcid 40mg a day for GERD
            Zytrec for Nasal Allergies
            Align Probiotic daily for IBS

            Comment


            • #21
              My 7 yr old twin grandsons have a "real" father who lives in NC & they have my daughters fiance (getting married soon). They call him Dad, cuz he's the one who coaches baseball & does the day to day stuff with & for them. They say they know the one in NC is their father but this one is "Dad". A child's point of view for you. Hugs, Kathi
              One Day At A Time
              Kathi

              Comment


              • #22
                Sorry, I didn't read carefullly - I put 'yes' but I meant 'no' - it is not wrong for him to call you Mommy. And no one else should have corrected him.

                Comment


                • #23
                  Thanks that really makes me feel so much better after the accusations directed at me today.
                  I was told she reported that I put shoes on him that are to small, and only she knows this because he curls his toes .. how stupid dose she think we are. There is no way Jake could walk like that..... Then I left red marks on his body but only she could see them, poor Gary told me he was asking where and she was pointing all over his neck Then I put clothes on him that are to small, and I am not feeding him right
                  You know if she didn't enjoy getting her butt beat so much I might have gotten in my van and drove out to her motel room! However I am not going to do anything to jeopardize losing Jake. I did tell my sister to tell her if she calls she better back off because I will not ever let her see him once I adopt him. and out of anger and disgust I told her to tell Christina if she didn't stop accusing me of doing things I'll let Foster care take him and she will never know how he is. Please know I would never do that, I just want her to stop harassing me. The courts must know that this would all be retaliation.
                  I am going to email Foster care and tell them I want a restraining order put in affect for her and James to stay away from all 4 of us.
                  I can't believe she would think I would hurt him.. Just because she did doesn't mean I will.
                  'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Tig...I keep typing how I really feel about this niece of yours and then deleting them so I guess I should just tell you that I am supporting you and praying for you.
                    Sharon

                    Shopping??? Did someone mention shopping? I'll get my hat... ;-)

                    Where I can be found most days.



                    Link to the ICN Patient Handbook:
                    http://www.ic-network.com/handbook/

                    Link to the IC Diet:
                    http://www.ic-network.com/diet/


                    IC Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Ditto what Sharon said!!!!!
                      Hugs,
                      Tracey
                      How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time...

                      Harry arrived 2/23/09!



                      *IC Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

                      IC Diet Cheat Sheet:
                      http://www.ic-network.com/diet/2009icdietlist.pdf



                      Dx's:
                      IC dx'd Nov 2004
                      Lymphocytic Colitis dx'd July 2005
                      Possible IBS
                      Current IC Meds
                      Vistaril 25mg in the evening
                      Previous IC Meds taken:
                      Cystoprotek - 2 caps 2x's a day
                      Elmiron, 100mg 3x's a day
                      Ditropan, 5 mg 3x's a day
                      Others:
                      Wellbutrin 150mg 2x's a day for Anxiety/IBS
                      Pepcid 40mg a day for GERD
                      Zytrec for Nasal Allergies
                      Align Probiotic daily for IBS

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Coming from a kids point of view

                        I was 15 when my parents divorced. My birth father went from being a dad, to being a jerk. He ended up calling me worthless and told me to leave. My mom and step dad tried so many times to make the relationship between me and my birth father work. After 2 years of deep depression and extreme fighting it came to a head. I went crying to my grandpa one too many times. He told me that I either needed to leave, or he was going to go beat up my dad. I left. (didnt want grandpa in jail) Two weeks later, I went to visit my dad. It was the same. He was mean and rude and just horrible. It has been 10 years since I last talked to him. All this time, my step dad has become my dad. Hes the one that supports me. Hes the one that tells me how much he loves me. Hes the one that has always been there for me. In my eyes, thats what a parent does. I always think of the Brad Paisley song "Didnt have to be" when I think of my step dad. He didnt have to be my dad but he is and always will be.

                        Jake is so young. Someone said earlier that many children have more than one mom. Its so true! I had a few moms growing up and I am thankful for it. You can never be too loved!

                        I think of you and Jake often, and I am so honored to know someone like you! You are taking on a child and raising this child as your own.
                        Meds: Percocet PRN; Pyridium PRN. First symptoms Dec 2005. Diagnosed in March 2006.

                        I am the proud mom of a two year old boy! I was lucky enough to be in remission my entire pregnancy. If you have any questions regarding my pregancy, delivery, breastfeeding, or pumping, feel free to contact me!

                        Im on Facebook! Just tell me you are from the ICN. Look me up under Kim Wayne.

                        I love working as a CNA in a nursing home. Started school in August part time. Going for my LPN!!!!

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          lol.... your feelings about here are probably equal to mine.. (((hugs))) its ok.. I talked to the social worker today and she told me not to worry about it. She will be stopping by here for a visit on Thursday or Friday.


                          Thank you Kuntrygirl,
                          I liked you wedding dress its really pretty
                          Last edited by tigger_gal; 03-13-2007, 02:08 PM.
                          'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            Cindy,
                            I can't believe that they are trying to say that you are not taking good care of Jake. I'm sure the case worker knows that it's a crock and is taking it with a grain of salt. I know you can't wait until that termination hearing comes and is finally over with. I hope the next couple of weeks go really fast for you and are hopefully flare free.
                            Christine



                            I have been diagnoised for 6 1/2 years now. I have taken a long break from the ICN but really miss helping out my fellow IC patients and want to get back into posting.
                            1st hydro 4/07 showed no visible signs of IC but tons of mast cells in all my biopsy samples which did prove IC.
                            2nd hydro 4/13/09 showed dark purple glomerulations and I had a capacity of 450 cc's. This hydro proved that my IC had progressed.
                            I have tried every oral medication as well as rescue instills and DMSO.

                            I have been lucky enough to see Dr Hanno, the top IC specialist in PA who has told me due to the fact that I have not responded to any "standard" treatments that I have a severe, end stage case of IC with a horrible quality of life (didn't have to tell me that last part!)

                            Proud wifey of Shane, mommy to Griffin, and step-mom to Logan and Gage
                            Also proud mom to the best Bullmastiff on earth, Claus

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Oh Cindy I wish I could give you an answer for this one but I can't. This is something you have to decide and that you feel comfortable with. But it is natural for a little one to call you mom when you are the one taking care of him. I don't know if it will confuse him if you try to stop him from doing so. Maybe as he gets older you can explain it to him. You are the one that knows Jake more and you just do what you think that is best for Jake.

                              I admire you for taking this little one into your home and giving him love.
                              Just sending hugs, Trishann

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