Relationship over and wanted to share

[KatrinaE]

Hi,
I can't help but feel sad that my relationship of twelve years is over, in some ways I am relieved because I was not getting the love and respect I deserve. I do feel like my health problems contributed to the relationship ending, although the other side is my partner was not willing to get the help he needed and support me when I was having sexual issues. I know that I am not ready to start dating again, and I am trying to focus on taking care of myself. It feels strange living alone, to make matters worse my ex has found a new girlfriend and they live downstairs. I have started looking for a new place to live, and am living here because it is inexpensive, I can't afford to put all my earnings into rent and it matters to me that I live in a safe and convenient area. I am looking for a new place to live and would like to find a place that will allow me to have a pet. I am thankful for my parents support with everything, they have been great. I am hoping that with the help of a counsellor I will get over some of the fear I have with sex. I think that this will be part of my healing process and I am sure that I am not alone in this. Someday when I am ready I hope I meet someone that is accepting of my health issues because they are part of me. Looking into meet up groups too hoping to meet others going through the divorce and seperation process. I just wanted to share this is case anyone else is feeling down about there current situation, it is nice to know the forum is a safe place for support.

[icnmgrjill]

I am so sorry that you are going through this. In the end, though, he didn't rise to the occasion helping his partner the she was ill and you deserve better than that.

We have a great section on sex and IC on our site and in our live support group meeting right before Valentines Day, I talked about sex in depth and how to approach it. You might want to check that out and watch it.

[ICNDonna]

When there is a split up of a long term relationship, it usually isn't a sudden thing --- but it's never easy --- and having your ex living so close has to be hard for you. Just remember that you deserve to have support and understanding. It's been many, many years (April 7 will mark 47 years since the beginning of my second marriage), but I remember the end of the first marriage and how difficult that time was. It's good that you will be reaching out to find groups going through the same thing --- I still have friends I met during the first months after my divorce.

Sending gentle hugs,
Donna