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  • For David

    You know the old saying it takes one hell of a man to raise another mans child. Especially when its a girl, and she has always been a Daddy's girl. Don't get me wrong she has always been respectful to David, and he to her. Ex hubby and Dave are very respectful of each other, so it all worked out. I am grateful to Dave, he took on my little girl, since she was 9, and raised her as if she were his. Even told people that was his daughter, never step daughter.
    David has had his share of problems growing up, from a mother who never wanted him, to a step father who beat him, his brother, and molested his sister. He walked in on it, and he was called a lier and beat for it.
    His mother gave custody of him to the state when he was 9, she gave up his his sister at 13, and his other sister moved out at 15 and pregnant (not by the step father) his brother was the perfect child, and it was said so.. ok that actually just softly scratches the surface.. (needed to give you some background here) Anywho, Not only did Dave take Ashley on and raise her, he has taken Jake on too. Now that Christina is pregnant, we plan on brining her little girl into our home.
    We have every intention on adopting both children.
    It takes one very special man to raise one child that is not his biological child, but to take on 2 more that are not his wives childern. That tells me he is on hell of a man.
    We have our problems, and they do run deep, but I have to give him the credit and recognition that he deserves. Not many men would do this, especially with the circumstances involved. We put up with a lot from my sister, and he tries very hard to hold his tongue. He has actually had a lot more patience with her then I have had lately.
    Regardless of the issues David and I have, he has loved these children like they belonged to him. Seeing him with Jake forces me to see the softer side of a man I never knew existed. Dave has changed a lot over the last few years, However, over the last year, I think he actually has realized the value and power of love, the love and bonding a child has with their Mommys and Daddy's.
    He never was showed any love as a child, and he will tell you, that Ashley and I are the only ones that have ever stood by him, and loved him anyway. It's much too complicated to explain, trust me. Only my very close friends know why. So what it comes down to is this. I am grateful that Dave (47) has it in his heart, to take on Jake and possibly a new little girl that are not biologically his.
    Last edited by tigger_gal; 04-30-2007, 06:06 PM.
    'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

  • #2
    That was really beautiful CIndy! And I can very much relate. My hubby Stephen met me and my oldest daughter Brianna when she was three. Her bio father has had little to do with us especially these past 2 years. Stephen just adaptde to the role of Daddy like it ws second nature. He is the same way, introducing her as his daughter, never his step daughter. When people say how much she looks like him he just beams and says "thank you". She started calling him daddy the day her little sister was born and that was SO special!. We do have our issues too, but he is getting so much better at trying to understand all this IC stuff and the baggage and depression that has come along with it for me.
    Here's to great guys!
    Rachel
    DX's:
    IC; PFD; possible Fibromyalgia; IBS;

    Symptoms: Frequency, Urgency, pelvic and bladder pain, bladder and pelvic spasms, difficulty starting urination, weak stream, incontinence, vaginal and urethral pain

    I've Tried:
    three Hydrodistentions, various Rescue Installments; 6 DSMO treatments; Pyridium Plus; Proced; Detrol (patch); Elavil; Uricet K; Elmiron; Nortiptyline; Ultram; Allegra; Ditropan; Ditropan ER; Vesicare; regular Lidocain; Neurontin; Lyrica; and few more I can't remember!
    Currently using:
    Valium; Vicadin; Proced DS; Claritin; Buffered Lidocain; Cymbalta; Baclofen; Prazosin @ night (also on Prednisone and Adderall for my joint pain and severe fatigue)
    Heating pads; frozen water bottles; A&D ointment; Poise pads; IC dieter since 8/06; yoga; imagery & relaxation CD, Mindfullness, self healing CD's; hot baths; seat cushion; prayer
    I am 28 yrs old, dx'ed in '06, still trying to get my health undercontrol!!

    Comment


    • #3
      Cindy,
      What a nice post to read. I married a man w/ 3 children so I can see where David is coming from. It's not really even a choice. You love that person and that person has children so you love them too. In your situation there was a need to take care of Jake so he wanted to do what needed to be done. It's not even an option to think of doing anything else. Glad that you have someone that is by your side through all of this.
      Christine



      I have been diagnoised for 6 1/2 years now. I have taken a long break from the ICN but really miss helping out my fellow IC patients and want to get back into posting.
      1st hydro 4/07 showed no visible signs of IC but tons of mast cells in all my biopsy samples which did prove IC.
      2nd hydro 4/13/09 showed dark purple glomerulations and I had a capacity of 450 cc's. This hydro proved that my IC had progressed.
      I have tried every oral medication as well as rescue instills and DMSO.

      I have been lucky enough to see Dr Hanno, the top IC specialist in PA who has told me due to the fact that I have not responded to any "standard" treatments that I have a severe, end stage case of IC with a horrible quality of life (didn't have to tell me that last part!)

      Proud wifey of Shane, mommy to Griffin, and step-mom to Logan and Gage
      Also proud mom to the best Bullmastiff on earth, Claus

      Comment


      • #4
        Both you and David are outstanding, caring, people.

        Donna
        Stay safe


        Elmiron Eye Disease Information Center - https://www.ic-network.com/elmiron-p...mation-center/
        Elmiron Eye Disease Fact Sheet (Downloadable) - https://www.ic-network.com/wp-conten...nFactSheet.pdf

        Have you checked the ICN Shop?
        Click on ICN Shop at the top of this page. You'll find Bladder Builder and Bladder Rest, both of which we are finding have excellent results.

        Patient Help: http://www.ic-network.com/patientlinks.html

        Sub-types https://www.ic-network.com/five-pote...markably-well/

        Diet list: https://www.ic-network.com/interstitial-cystitis-diet/

        AUA Guidelines: https://www.ic-network.com/aua-guide...tial-cystitis/

        I am not a medical authority nor do I offer medical advice. In all cases, I strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.
        [3MG]

        Anyone who says something is foolproof hasn't met a determined fool

        Comment


        • #5
          Cindy,
          You are so right it does take a special man to take on kids that are not his own.. But you also need to give yourself some credit to.. You are taking on 2 kids that are not yours biologically..So you know what the old saying is..........Behind every good man stands a GREAT woman

          Luv ya girly
          Ronda
          Hugs
          Ronda

          ONE Second, ONE Bite, ONE Breath, ONE Pill, ONE Minute, ONE Teardrop, ONE Hour, ONE Sip.. ONE DAY! I will Prevail from this disease! IC Hoping for a Cure!


          Link to Patient Handbook:
          http://www.ic-network.com/handbook/

          Diet Reference Sheet:
          http://www.ic-network.com/diet/icndi...tsheet0909.pdf

          Meds For IC: Lyrica-25mg Glucosamine-500 MSM-500mg, Prosed Ds -When Flaring

          Other Meds: Levlite- Continious Birtcontrol, Micardis-40mg for High Blood Pressure

          Meds I have Tried:
          Topamax,Tofranil, Elmiron, Atarax, Cymbalta, Elavil, Enablex, Detral La, Prydium.
          Lexapro< Bad reaction to this med!
          Intstills, could not continue them due to some kind of reaction after 3rd instill. Tasted the lidocaine in my mouth, tongue and lips went numb then went into what seemed like a panic attack. Shaking, racing heart, tingling face/head, blood pressure shot up..

          Dx With IC in Nov 2006 with Hydro/Cysto
          Hydro/Cysto Caused Bladder to Rupture.

          Other Dxs-Vulvodynia,Fibro, Endo, IBS, HPV, Migraines, Spastic Colon, Mild Dysplasia.



          ICN Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

          Comment


          • #6
            Cindy...You brought tears to my eyes with your post. Yes, it does take a very good man (or woman) to take someone else's child or children and love them like they are their own.

            My hubby did that with my 10 year old son almost 27 years ago. Whenever I get angry or upset with him about some stupid thing, I remember that and my heart melts, once again.
            Sharon

            Shopping??? Did someone mention shopping? I'll get my hat... ;-)

            Where I can be found most days.



            Link to the ICN Patient Handbook:
            http://www.ic-network.com/handbook/

            Link to the IC Diet:
            http://www.ic-network.com/diet/


            IC Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

            Comment


            • #7
              Ronda,
              I read a quote once from some famous woman that said "Behind every successful man is a stunned woman" That's what I thought of when I read that, thought everyone might like a good laugh, lol
              Christine



              I have been diagnoised for 6 1/2 years now. I have taken a long break from the ICN but really miss helping out my fellow IC patients and want to get back into posting.
              1st hydro 4/07 showed no visible signs of IC but tons of mast cells in all my biopsy samples which did prove IC.
              2nd hydro 4/13/09 showed dark purple glomerulations and I had a capacity of 450 cc's. This hydro proved that my IC had progressed.
              I have tried every oral medication as well as rescue instills and DMSO.

              I have been lucky enough to see Dr Hanno, the top IC specialist in PA who has told me due to the fact that I have not responded to any "standard" treatments that I have a severe, end stage case of IC with a horrible quality of life (didn't have to tell me that last part!)

              Proud wifey of Shane, mommy to Griffin, and step-mom to Logan and Gage
              Also proud mom to the best Bullmastiff on earth, Claus

              Comment


              • #8
                thanks girls .. you are right, that includes the ladies too..

                leelee loved the comment
                'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

                Comment


                • #9
                  Lol Christine...Yea thats true to...
                  Hugs
                  Ronda

                  ONE Second, ONE Bite, ONE Breath, ONE Pill, ONE Minute, ONE Teardrop, ONE Hour, ONE Sip.. ONE DAY! I will Prevail from this disease! IC Hoping for a Cure!


                  Link to Patient Handbook:
                  http://www.ic-network.com/handbook/

                  Diet Reference Sheet:
                  http://www.ic-network.com/diet/icndi...tsheet0909.pdf

                  Meds For IC: Lyrica-25mg Glucosamine-500 MSM-500mg, Prosed Ds -When Flaring

                  Other Meds: Levlite- Continious Birtcontrol, Micardis-40mg for High Blood Pressure

                  Meds I have Tried:
                  Topamax,Tofranil, Elmiron, Atarax, Cymbalta, Elavil, Enablex, Detral La, Prydium.
                  Lexapro< Bad reaction to this med!
                  Intstills, could not continue them due to some kind of reaction after 3rd instill. Tasted the lidocaine in my mouth, tongue and lips went numb then went into what seemed like a panic attack. Shaking, racing heart, tingling face/head, blood pressure shot up..

                  Dx With IC in Nov 2006 with Hydro/Cysto
                  Hydro/Cysto Caused Bladder to Rupture.

                  Other Dxs-Vulvodynia,Fibro, Endo, IBS, HPV, Migraines, Spastic Colon, Mild Dysplasia.



                  ICN Volunteers are not medical authorities nor do we offer medical advice. In all cases, we strongly encourage you to discuss your medical treatment with your personal medical care provider. Only they can, and should, give medical recommendations to you.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    cindy you made me cry.i know what it feels like,i met my husband when my daughter was 18 months old,i left her abusive father when she was 3 months old cuz i didn't want her to go thru ehat i did.my husband fell in love with her the same time he fell in love with me.her biological father has never even tried to see her and i am actually glad for that.my hubby has always called her his and she loves him to death also.i have always said it takes a special man to raise another mans child,especially since there are so many men out there who don't even care about their own kids.you are a lucky woman,but like the other girls said,so is he,and so are jake and ashley and the new baby.god bless you.jamie

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      You both have been blessed & have the vision to see how lucky you all are to have each other.
                      Hugs Sandra
                      "Never Give Up."

                      To view pictures of my creative interests and Maine Coon kittens click here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/[email protected]/

                      My Photobucket Link:
                      http://s237.photobucket.com/albums/f...ramack_photos/

                      Comment

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