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  • Katrina
    replied
    After I finally got a grip on things after I had lost my memory, I started praying "Thank you Lord for the experience I had with my memory, and I have learned from it, and now that I have learned, can you please take the Epilepsy away" I still wanted it to end even after I could see the good in it. I suspose in the long wrong, instead I was given more challenges, more growth, more changes. "The path of our growth is not always the way of our choosing". That doesn't mean it doesn't work. If "my story" ever gets up, it could be a really good one, not souly on IC but on health problems and hope regardless of how bad it can be. I know that sometimes there is no way around it. Asking why is part of the grief process of loosing "health, and the old life style" , but there is a lot more to it.

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  • Britgal
    replied
    Katrina, the point you mentioned about have you grown having IC, my answer would be a definite yes. I know I have changed, and grown a lot since I have been diagnosed. I am a stronger woman because of it, and changed my viewpoints on a lot of areas in my life because of it. My life feels richer, and fuller because of it, and I also feel that the Lord has helped me out when I was at my lowest point, and struggling with the pain of IC. I can totally understand the feeling of why me, and I cannot really explain how my feelings changed, but it was almost like one gal said about ranting and raving about having IC, I did that, and also cried a lot. Then I finally said O.K.Lord I need a helping hand here, and from that moment on, have not cried about having IC and have been very fortunate in finding out what meds helped me, the right urologist, and nurse practitioner, who I dearly love and respect for her wonderful caring health care, and finding the network and the IC family, it seemed like everything fell into place at the one time, my son even commented when he was here for a visit after all my ranting and going on about IC, wow mum you have really flipped a switch here, and he was right, it was almost like turning on a light and coming out of the darkness and knowing I had a helping hand. I still also have those not so great times, but I seem to be able to weather them better and feel stronger than I ever did. I also now always wear a cross around my neck, and that also gives me strength to fight my IC and not give in when I am feeling low. I also add a thank you in my prayers at night for feeling this way, take care and love and hugs to all, Iris hi angel grouphug

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  • Katrina
    replied
    I hope from my least message you didn't think I don't understand your feeling, that couldn't be parther from the trueth. That is how I felt after I lost all my memory at age 12. I think if God hadn't responded to my questions then I would have killed myself. That time is a sorse of strength now.
    Today I feel that God doesn't make these things happen but He does allow them. He then uses them for good, if we let Him.
    It may be very difficult to not focus on how difficult this is and how painful, but just for a moment look and see, have you changed? Have you grown in ways you wouldn't have without IC? Do you have a deaper insight you never had before?

    If you can yes do still say, so why do I still have to have IC, if I have already grown so much? I say things like that still.

    But I also say; how can I use this time to grow somemore, to help others, and to learn that I need God?

    I believe that are sufferings are not from God. He cries to see us like this. He loves us, and just like a parent watching their child go through something they could prevent but need to go through to grow he suffers.

    So I ask God, what do I need to learn? What do you think I can become from this? There are times you say that the person suffering is going to die, what is the point in their learning, so I tell, maybe it is for you to learn. Maybe it is for society to learn.

    I don't know, but I do believe in a all powerful God, working for good.

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  • Teri
    replied
    I get very discouraged at times. I've got a picture next of my computer of a girl screaming into the clouds yelling "YO, GOD! ARE YOU LISTENING?????"

    It's funny how something so simple can help so much~

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  • pl8te
    replied
    Brat,

    I will continue to pray for you. I do understand the frustration you are feeling. I know it's hard, and we won't know the answers till we are in heaven with God. I am praying that God will somehow give you peace with this frustration, and help you to fully put your trust in Him.

    Kristi

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  • queenbeemig
    replied
    yep...i know the feeling all too well. I prayed so hard morning, noon and nite to let my symptoms just disappear. I pray that i do not have this awful disease. My symptoms persisted. I was so mad at God. Why does he not hear me? Why can't he answer my prayers? What did i do to deserve this? I cried so hard one day, my husband thought i was going to have a nervous breakdown then i unleashed my anger toward God. I ranted and raved about how he does not hear me. A funny thing happened then....i stopped crying and i was so worn out. A calmness came over me. I then softly prayed for patience. Dear God, if you cant heal me then give me the patience to deal and cope with this. You know something, i have not shed one tear since that day! If i do have this dreadful disease, i will pray only for the ability to cope with it. Dear God, don't let it rob me of my spirit! Let me be happy. What more can we all ask for? Keep praying...your prayers do get answered somehow!

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  • ICNJess
    replied
    Brat--

    Hugs and love. I completely know what you are feeling. I love ya!!!

    grouphug kissing angel

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  • tigger_gal
    replied
    HI There,
    I am really going to open myself up here and probably really get my head bit off for this and maybe I deserve to and maybe I don't. I have thought about this and it really gets on my last nerve and I like many others I am sure of have to ask WHY PRAY? I have prayed until I thought I would turn blue! Ask God? Ask god what? did you do this to me? whay did you do this to me? what did I do to deserve IC and what comes with it? Why do the good die young? Then we have... its not god that dose it its satan... so here is my prayer request:
    Dear God, I pray HE(double)L freezes over so we all get better, and we no longer suffer and feel pain of an on going never ending disease, and, there are never any more sick, starving children in this world, abused wifes and girlfriends, no more drunks and drug addicts and drug pushers... becasue if HE(double)L freezes over it would no longer exist and neiter would satan....
    this is my thoughts for the day.
    Brat
    ps.. my daughter dose go to church regularly 2 times a week and is involved in the teen groups at church... these are strictly my thoughts at this moment

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  • Katrina
    replied
    Don't ask why but ask what. Why we may not ever know while we are here one Earth, an all powerful God can be understood. Ask what, what can you do with the situation, what do you need to learn, what do you need to see, what is the message, or the perfect surprise that comes with a hopeless situation. I do not believe God causes the hurt, the pain, the ****, or the hate in the world, but when suffering arrises he uses it for good,look to see God in the midst of the suffering. It is when we are week that God is able to get in, because that is when we know we need Him. It isn't always easy to recognize right away, but someday, you may look back and know that this time of suffering was the most influencial part of your life, it made you who you, and you have become someone very special. It happened to me. I say these words because of experience, not just because they may sound right. God Bless you all. kissing angel

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  • pl8te
    replied
    Brat,

    Please trust in the Lord. He is with you! I have only recently been DX'd, but was right where you are in your feelings not more that 3 months ago. I was losing faith. I felt as if all I believed in was a big lie. That is when I know God guided me to reach out for help from my Christian family. I was able to talk with caring neighbors and to members of my church. I was immediately added to their prayer chain, and I could FEEL the presence of the Lord in my heart. I doesn't seem fair that others seem to lead charmed lives with no problems or illness. Please don't let satan shake your faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. We are still in the hands of God, the God who is always for us and whose will shall be done. In the face of the mystery of ****, God says to us, "Trust Me." I am praying for you. I have not always been so forward with speaking to people about my faith, but now I feel the need to share God's love with others. I am not at all happy at being stuck with IC and who knows what else, but in this life believers are not spared sickness or accidents or death. Please continue to reach out to others and continue to pray.

    O Lord, there is so much I do not understand. Help me to trust. Amen


    Kristi

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  • Britgal
    replied
    I feel like Zookeeper, I know I have been through some good and bad times as well with different aspects of my life, and I try now to just take everything one step at a time, one day at a time. I know that dealing with IC has made a stronger person out of me, even though at the beginning I kept thinking to myself "why me", what have I done? But now I feel that is has made me stronger, and made me appreciate the good things I have in life, and hopefully given me the extra strength to deal with bad things that come along, who knows? I still do not understand why bad things happen to good people, but one day it may all be made clear to us, that is my particular point of view. Take care everyone Iris hi hat

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  • Zookeeper
    replied
    They say God only gives us as much as we can handle. It makes us stronger(So they say any way.)
    I think if that is the case then there must be some really big whimps out there.LOL
    Good times bad times been through it all sometimes we can only live in the moment to get us by.There is help for us some day,We just have to believe it will be in time for us.Take care!

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  • ICyuck
    replied
    Brat, I lose faith sometimes too. The sense that I get is that we are all in a combat zone, between good and ev#l. That we volunteered for this combat duty before we were born. I don't understand why pain and suffering is necessary but I am sure it's not G*d who wishes this on us or does this to us.

    I believe that we live in the combat zone now, and when we die, we go back home and home is a wonderful place.

    Love, ICY

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  • tigger_gal
    replied
    HI
    Guess I want to add my 2 cents worth here!
    I don't understand why a god so great makes one suffer so much and die. no matter how you explain it to me I STILL DON'T GET I! I had a hard time watching my Best friend die a terrible pain full death in 1993, my grandfather a painful death in 2000, and my uncle a terrble painful slow death this past sept.. then i find out one of my friends sister died of cancer a week ago.... These were good people. they din't do any thing bad to make them suffer unmercibley. They didn't do, witch craft, or worship the d****. THEY WERE GOOD so please tell why do we have to suffer...
    The first verse and last verse I ever knew and remembered from the bible is:
    God, so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, those who believeth in him shall not parish and have ever lasting life?
    I don't get this either.. I thought I did.
    sorry to say this but I really not sure what I beliee any more...
    Brat

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  • Britgal
    replied
    Hi Kaff and thank you for the quote in your posting, it is a great one to remember, and comforting when those dark days come around with IC, thanks and hugs Iris hi kissing hat

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