Anyone else punish themselves on accident?

[nineteenwinters]

So since this week has been the first week I have felt 'normal' in a long while I was waking up depressed. Usually when I would get up I would have a Red Bull (it doesn't do anything for me anymore but it's my favorite tasting carbonated beverage). So now waking up is kind of depressing.

So I thought to cheer myself up for dinner I would order a pizza. So I got a cheese, and chicken pizza with no sauce. So I am eating it and it's OK (I miss the sauce obviously) but it tastes like my old foods a little so I am still eating it.

Then I am like, this is good. You know what, let me just grab a Red Bull and have some salad with ranch and this would be REAL good.



I don't know how I am going to make it through this. I really, really am missing something carbonated.

It has only been one month and I am so tempted to just try a root beer even though it could erase my good month. This sucks.

[earthlady]

Yeah it does suck. A first I tried everything possible to keep being able to drink my tea. I tried the prelief, baking soda, tums, you name it. It was very depressing to realize I just couldn't drink it anymore. I walked by a food court the other day looking (and drooling) over the spicy spaghetti and meatballs and I almost ordered it (almost) but ended up with a blah piece of chicken over plain spaghetti with garlic powder and oregano on it. I've gone a long time now with no flares or anything but would love to get to the point where I could have something spicy. I'd kill for my spicy chili right now.

[kadi]

When I crave something carbonated, I put blueberry or pear juice into the blender with a bunch of ice cubes and make a slushie. It's not the same, but it helps a little.

By the way, I'm ok with Marie's Lite Creamy Ranch Dressing. I put a little on the side of the plate and dip my fork in it between bites. Prelief helps with it too.
You can get Marie's Ranch in the refrigerated section of the produce department of grocery stores.

[nineteenwinters]

I'll have to try that Kadi. I only can find straight blueberry juice so it will have to be with that. Thanks!

I am giving myself another month (of the diet and drugs to work) before I will try anything iffy. But when that happens I will try that dressing!

If they take out your bladder do you get to eat whatever you want again? Probably not.

I know I am being over dramatic I just need that sliver of hope from somewhere.

[earthlady]

You can make the ranch without mayo. I use buttermilk and the ranch mix and I'm ok with it.

[nineteenwinters]

I am still looking for a ranch mix I can have. I only visited the grocery store briefly so I'll look harder next time. All of the ones I saw had BHT.

[earthlady]

Oh forgot about the BHT you might not tolerate. I guess maybe an organic mix at Whole Foods or a health food store. There are mixes called Simply Organic but not sure if they make the ranch. You can always make your own from scratch. I know people who do this but I've never bothered.

[nineteenwinters]

MSG not BHT*

Also a lot that don't have MSG have lactic acid. Even though it's the last ingredient I am hesitant until I clear at least 2 months to try it. I was looking it up and it seems to come from sour milk. If I can have milk do you think I can have lactic acid? Some of these are so confusing.

[earthlady]

That's a good question. Dairy products have never bothered my bladder although I can get the runs from them. If yogurt bothers you then lactic acid may also. Good question to put in the Diet Section.

[Toto]

Nineteenwinters,

You've given me hope because you have improved. I'm glad to hear the diet has at least made a dent in your symptoms. I'm praying that the diet will help me also. But I hear ya about missing foods. I finally gave up coffee and it kills me not to have one. And because I can't have it I miss it even more, especially a latte. And when I see advertisements for Coca Cola or Pepsi I'm dying for one with a big glass of ice. Before I ate tomatoes all the time. I have no idea yet what to do about the pizza situation. That is my FAVORITE food. I've been reading suggestions, such as yours, and might give the chicken and cheese only a try.

[nineteenwinters]

I am sorry you're still in pain. *hugs* Sometimes I wish I was sick again because I didn't care about eating anything and lived on oatmeal. I didn't have pain just frequency though. I know the diet is helping at least a little because my meds took a week to 'kick in' and the only thing helping my frequency had to be the diet. Unless I get stressed I am only going every 2-3 hours and 2 times at night. Maybe I would feel different if I had pain as well. I just feel like everything is a struggle these days whether I am healthy or sick.

Food ads are from the devil. *nods*

I hope the diet will help you as you continue on. Not being in pain I am sure would make the limited food selection a little worth it.

The sad thing is if I could just have 1 cool ranch dorrito and 1/2 a Red Bull I would easily make it though another month. Just a 1/2 hour of flavor. Ugh. I think the finality of the diet is getting to me.

[kadi]

You do get used to it after awhile. Now when I smell a Coke, all I smell is chemicals. But in the beginning - it drove me crazy...

[wagamama]

I think it's really important to adhere to the diet strictly at first. Over time, you may find that you can tolerate a root beer or something once in a while. Perhaps if you tell yourself this may not be forever, that might make it easier for right now.

I agree with Kadi about your tastes changing over time. I used to be a huge red wine drinker, but then I went wine tasting with my husband and took the teeniest sip of his wine - it tasted super sour like vinegar. I don't miss it anymore.

[nineteenwinters]

Yep, that's why I am still on it even though I want to rip my hair out.

I don't think I'll ever get over wanting a Red Bull or a Dorito to be honest. Maybe I won't crave it as much but I just don't think that's going to happen. These like 7 main meals I can have are going to get old fast. I don't like a lot of the items people use to replace things (bell pepper sauces, cream cheese, cottage cheese, radishes etc.) I have always craved fast foods over regular food and that's not going to change eating chicken and rice lol. I may learn to cope better but I don't see me suddenly thinking those foods were horrible.

*sips blueberry juice*

[earthlady]

I used to be a wine drinker also and I had the same effect when I tasted some a while ago. It tasted so much like a mix of vinegar and acid that I don't think I will ever want to drink it again- even if I could.